“”I tell you, the shit doesn't fall far from the bat.
|—Bill Maher on Rand Paul|
Randal Howard Paul is the batshit crazy son of U.S. Representative Ron Paul and junior Senator from Kentucky. On 18 May 2010, registered Republicans in Kentucky nominated Rand to run for the U.S. Senate seat that was being vacated by former Cincinnati Reds pitcher Jim "Brushback" Bunning. By profession, Rand is an ophthalmologist.
 True political leanings
While both Pauls are registered Republicans, both are actually paleolibertarians at heart. However, while the senior Paul continues to identify himself as a libertarian, Rand has expressed the wish that the Tea Party was an actual party so that he could leave the GOP and join them.
However, there is some question about whether Rand Paul shares his father's libertarian views on foreign policy, given that he campaigned in 2010 as a hawk on the War on Terror, in particular calling for Guantanamo detainees to be tried in military tribunals rather than civilian courts, a moratorium on travel visas from so-called "terrorist nations," opposing Constitutional protections for accused foreign terrorists, and supporting construction of military bases on the U.S. border. However Dick Cheney and other neocons still don't trust him and think he is "not one of us," which is enough to have at least some libertarians excitedly foaming about his candidacy. Plus, he thinks the United States is a "Christian nation" and it's the basis of the country's laws.
On the issue of same-sex marriage, Paul takes a states rights approach, personally opposing same-sex marriage but believing that states should decide for themselves on how to approach the issue. He expressed approval for the Supreme Court decision striking down Section 3 of the Defense of Marriage Act, but also appeared after said ruling on Glenn Beck's show and expressed concern that same-sex marriage would lead to bestiality.
 From anti-government bureaucracy to anti-private-organization bureaucracy
One month after his nomination, Dr. Paul started ducking questions about his board certification. Or, more precisely, his lack thereof. It seems that Rand's staunch libertarianism foments just as much animosity towards the perceived intrusiveness of private professional organizations as it does towards the perceived intrusiveness of the government. In 1999, he helped create the National Board of Ophthalmology -- which is not recognized by the American Board of Medical Specialties -- so that he and his fellow ophthalmologists could get recertified without all the
rigor bureaucratic red tape of that nasty, stodgy old American Board of Ophthalmology. Paul is also a member of the Association of American Physicians and Surgeons (AAPS), a fringe group of conservative quacks that denies the link between HIV and AIDS and claims that Barack Obama won the presidency through some form of mind control. They're also the generous providers of Andrew Schlafly's wingnut welfare.
 His mouth runneth over
It seems that diarrhea of the mouth runs in the Paul family. In 1992, after the riots in Los Angeles that followed the Rodney King verdict, Papa Paul wrote in one of his newsletters that the rioting only stopped when the rioters left to pick up their welfare checks. Baby Paul seems determined to outdo Papa Paul in the crazy comment department. Consider some of the comments that he made within a week winning of the nomination:
- On May 11th, 2011 Rand Paul stated that if some one believes in a right to health care...that it means people have the right to the home of hospital staff and enslave them. Time to die!
- During the weekend before he was nominated, Rand said he wouldn't mind seeing a repeal of the Americans With Disabilities Act (ADA) because it was unfair to businesses.
- After winning the nomination, Rand told interviewers Rachel Maddow of MSNBC and Robert Siegel of NPR that the Civil Rights Act of 1964 should never have been passed. He later backtracked, telling people that he was not a racist. He just thought that the Act was harmful to businesses. (But, Rand, if those comments don't reflect who you really are, why did you hold your victory party at an "exclusive" country club?)
- A few days later, Rand chastised President Obama for his "anti-business" criticism of BP's piss-poor handling of the volcano of oil and natural gas that they created in the Gulf of Mexico.
- And then he told an interviewer that there would be no need for laws if everybody was a Christian. Specifically, "I see that Christianity and values is the basis of our society... 98% of us won’t murder people, won’t steal, won’t break the law and it helps a society to have that religious underpinning."
- More on the BP oil volcano, Rand thought that people should stop playing the blame game because, well, shit happens.
And all that, folks, happened in just one week - which is a shame because that same week he canceled what would have been a lulzy interview on NBC's Meet the Press after he had promised to come. According to NBC political reporter Domenico Montanaro, Rand was only the third "major guest" in the show's 63 year history to cancel. It looks like Rand may be Sarah Palin with an M.D. We can only hope.
- ↑ http://www.politicalarticles.net/blog/2010/05/24/kentucky-fried-rand-palin-paul-a-shit-that-doesnt-fall-far-from-the-bat/
- ↑ http://www.randpaul2010.com/2009/11/rand-paul-try-convict-and-lock-up-terrorists-in-guantanamo/
- ↑ http://www.lewrockwell.com/blog/lewrw/archives/53507.html
- ↑ Rand Paul in '08: Beware the NAFTA Superhighway, TPM Muckraker
- ↑ http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/03/24/rand-paul-gay-marriage_n_2944056.html
- ↑ http://abcnews.go.com/blogs/politics/2013/06/rand-paul-on-gay-mmarriage-gop-needs-to-agree-to-disagree/
- ↑ http://maddowblog.msnbc.com/_news/2013/06/26/19156364-post-doma-rand-paul-fears-humans-marrying-non-humans?lite
- ↑ Gerth, Joseph. "Rand Paul's ophthalmology certification not recognized by national clearinghouse", Louisville Courier-Journal website, posted and accessed 14 June 2010.
- ↑ The image of Laurence Olivier taking a dental drill to Dustin Hoffman in Marathon Man may now be supplanted by the image of Rand Paul taking a laser scalpel to someone's eyes in Bowling Green. Please, Dr. Paul, just don't ask "Is it safe?"
- ↑ Louisville Courier-Journal: Rand Paul part of AAPS doctors' group airing unusual views
- ↑ Wachter, Paul. "Does Racism Run in the Paul Family?", AOLNews website, posted and accessed 21 May 2010.
- ↑ Let's just hope Rand isn't exhibiting signs of the daddy complex that Obama's predecessor had.
- ↑ Rand Paul: If You Believe In A Right To Health Care, ‘You Believe In Slavery’
- ↑ Sonka, Joe. "Rand Paul Wants To Abolish The Americans With Disabilities Act, Citing Fairness ‘To The Business Owner’", Think Progress website, 17 May 2010, accessed 21 May 2010.
- ↑ Interview on Rachel Maddow Show. Broadcast on MSNBC on May 19, 2010.
- ↑ Likely a code word for "socialist."
- ↑ Stein, Sam. "Rand Paul: Obama Sounds 'Un-American' For Criticizing BP Over Gulf Oil Spill", Huntington Post website, posted and accessed 21 May 2010.
- ↑ Posner, Sarah. "Rand Paul: We Wouldn't Need Laws If Everyone Were Christian", RD Magazine website, posted and accessed 21 May 2010.
- ↑ Shearer, Harry. "The Rand Paul Quote Everybody's Ignoring", Huffington Post website, 21 May 2010, accessed 22 May 2010.
- ↑ Montanaro, Domenico. "Rand Paul cancels Meet the Press", MSNBC website, 21 May 2010, accessed 2 June 2010.