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Conservapedia:What is going on at CP?

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Wigocp.svg This page is pretty much dead, but is being retained for historical purposes. To put things politely, it's 2023, and we don't care about Conservapedia anymore. Adding new entries is discouraged.
The once popular entries are found at Best of Conservapedia and the older entries are found in the archives.

What is going on?

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Trus me
Conservapedia
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July 2023

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22Not content with expunging sneaky liberal bias from the Bible, Andy turns his attention to the Lord's Prayer, which is clearly too supportive of monarchism and the evil globalist agenda. His improved, non-commie version changes "your kingdom come, your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven" to the much improved "your paradise arrive, let your will thrive, here as it is in heavenimg". There, no mention of that pesky globalist earth malarky or kings. Much better.

June 2023

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59
RobSmith on the Russian invasion of Ukraine

May 2023

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61Ken updates his guide to bashing himselfimg.
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42Conservapedia reports another setback for the homosexual akenda: "Target Stocks Falls for the 7th Day After Earnings. Now Backlash to Its LGBTQ+ Merch Is Hitting Shares."img

April 2023

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42Andy homeschools us with the latest news about the terrible tragenda:

March 2023

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57Ken shows his commitment to his life goals by updating his agendaimg:
One small step for Ken, one giant leap out of the closet.

February 2023

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47According to esteemed RW alumni and general polymath nobs being trans is a "next-level delusion" just below having a "god complex."img
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31How do you maintain the reputation of a trustworthy encyclopaedia when it comes to discussing climate science? Use the IPCC as a source? What about NASA? Of course not. What we really need is the learned expertiseimg of David Icke, someone who's quoted in CP's own articleimg as saying he believes "the world is run by reptiles in human form". Yep, now we're even more trustworthy. Yay!

January 2023

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32Master educator Andy uses his genius to explain the benefits of phonics. In doing so we learn thatimg: "Boys who grow up in an illiterate-dominant region has a life expectancy in England that is 26 years shorter than a boy who grow up in a highly literate area."
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30Andy has more translation insights: Water into wine? Hmm... How about water into grape juice? The age-old debate continues.img Bonus: And let's change "dogs" to "homosexuals"img while we're at it.

December 2022

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32AiG's colossal failure of a theme parkWikipedia is "bigger than woke Disneyland", according toimg esteemed ratings expert Ken Demeyer.
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30Disney's first 🏳️‍🌈 LGBTQ 🏳️‍🌈 movieimg catches Ken's attention.

November 2022

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32"Don't you just hate microbreweries?img
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31
Ken shares his "findings" about atheism and sexual satisfactionimg.

Meanwhile, it is completely natural for a thoroughly sexually satisfied heterosexual gentleman like Ken to flaunt his carnal peace of mind by bringing us his insights about…

See also: Summa Homosexualita

October 2022

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32Ken's attention turns to Matt Walsh and John Oliver's transexual propagandaimg.
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30 VargasMilan:Too bad the Third Reich didn't work out.img Bonus: The "semites" "meddle in the affairs of other countriesimg.
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32According to RobSmith, Ukrainian "trolls" are behindimg suspected hacks into inactive Conservapedia accounts because reasons.

September 2022

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31Ken describes his insights about gay Brit gluttonsimg.

August 2022

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32
Ken brings the latest news about the homosexual akenda.

July 2022

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31Ken describes his insights about homosexuality and parasitesimg and monkeypoximg.
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32Ukrainian mathematician, Maryna Viazovska, has become only the second woman to receive the prestigious Fields Medal.
We eagerly await the official announcement of the recipients of the Fields Medal's merit-based alternative — which winners are announced at the same time so that real achievement is recognized — the ConservaMath Medal 2022 2018 2014 (not awarded yet) 2010 (which Ben Green seems to have won, but more nominations and insights are certainly welcome).img Hopefully, neither a woman, nor an Obama-supporter, nor a communist-trained Việt wins (not racist, you politically-correct trickster!), and the liberal claptrap based on the Fields Medal would be eliminated forevermore.

June 2022

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31
Wishing Ken a happy pride month.
  • Japanimg bans Same Sex-Marriage. First transexual swimmers are banned from international competitions by the world swimming body and now this! Oh homosexual activists and supporters, feel the sting! img
  • Pray away the gay, Spiderman!img
  • How the Transgender Community Uses Cult-like Tactics and Unmitigated Fear to Seduce and Destroy.img

May 2022

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32Ken describes his insights about atheism, pederasty and NAMBLAimg.
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30Protect the Great Replacement articleimg? I'll make my OWN Great Replacement articleimg with blackjack! And hookers!
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32Flame war on the new Great Replacement pageimg results in multiple blocks and insults thrown around. Highlights include "You added this stupid symbol for no reason. I bet you've never made a women cum, bastard bitch. I bet you're a TIM who got your dick and balls cut off and a replacer from Mexico or Palinstine.", "LOOK! more broken brackets and stupid formatting errors! let me know when you are done having a gay threesome with Nick Fuentes and Vaush, cockwanker.", as well as RobSmith revertingimg an edit that gave context to a Biden quote, then protecting the page so no one could fix it. The battle continues on this talk page.img Update: RobSmith(Z) statesimg that if Jackin the box does not write an article about the Right Sector, they are a Holocaust denier.

April 2022

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30Ken: "Also, if the state of Minnesota can't even get its policing right as evidenced by its burned down police station in Minneapolis, how in the world can it confidently assert how old the earth is?"img

March 2022

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33Ken describes his insights about Russia, Ukraine, history, church history and gay paradesimg.
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30Aschlafascism 101: Links to Nazi sites by DavidB4? No problem, no apology needed! But don't you dare point it out!11!1!1!1!!!
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32The Autistic Patriot adds Fantastic Mr. FoxWikipedia to the list of the worst liberal movies, but commits the ultimate sin of praising it while doing so
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30Comrade Nobs encourages the Marxist-Lenninist-Stalinist-Schleftist praxis of piracy.

February 2022

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33RobSmith blames Karajou for turning Conservapedia into a Ghost Townimg
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42Andy's new additional reasoning for maintaining the Conservative Bible Project, "liberals are erasing hell".

January 2022

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30Ken explains, "Transgender activismimg also includes the attempts of government and non-governmental agencies to sexualize and recruit small children into the homosexual lifestyle without parental consent."
See also: Psychological projection
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32Ken DeMyer says changing language trends are worse than mass shootings.
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30Conservapedia now undergoes a white nationalist takeover by Vince Did 7-14 and Mr. Nationalist. Where's Ken? Where's Andy? Where's DavidB4? (oh wait, DavidB4 likes the Daily Stormer) Where's Nobs, the grand marshal commanding the front line persecution of those damn subversive commie libs? Let the record show the depths of depraved hell Conservapedia continues to descend into. But don't worry, for their banishment into oblivion and utter obscurity continues.
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32The Alexa ranking of Conservapedia takes another steep dive towards oblivion.
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30It's been exactly a year since the January 6th insurrection, while Andy and RobS do their obligatory celebration, Ken slowly turns the site into RationalWikiWiki 6.0.
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60It's baaaaaaaaaaaack
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58New year resolution? Kennyboy stops caring about the 90/10 rule. This proceeds his arbitrary "enforcement" of 90/10 to weaponize a kangaroo court against ConwayIII, reaching astounding levels of hypocrisy. Conservapedia's attribution of hypocrisy as a liberal trait thus deems Ken an evil librul.

December 2021

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32
More from Ken's Summa Homosexualita
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48New Year's Eve Conservapedian senility: Schlafly demonstrates a failure to distinguish between Ron Paul and Rand Paul.
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60The 'Biden regime' are communists and Nazis, says Northwest. No basic understanding of European history...
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58Only on Conservapedia do hateful squabblers dedicate hours of time calling others wikiholics.
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50"Dr. Rand Paul, Indiana Senator" Behold at the sight of the latest Conservapedian senility, Nobs edition!
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60Fake cartoon Phyllis: "This is one of the worst mistreatment of political prisoners I've ever seen!"

Off screen sock puppet: "Where, Phyllis? Communist China? North Korea? The Gulag Archipelago?"

Fake cartoon Phyllis: "The continued imprisonment in D.C. of Trump supporters. Will some patriots die in jail?"

Merry Fucking Christmas from the soiled underpants at Christmas In Conservapedia Hell, 2021
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58Conservapedia's decline accelerates rapidly on the highway to utter demise. Merry Christmas!
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60The tumbling descent of Conservapedia Alexa rankings into oblivion demonstrates their end is nigh.
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40Nobs slacks off for a day. [1]img
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42LT recruits BHathorn for 2022 midterm drama. [2]img Quidam65 joins the partyimg.
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40The latest stale MPL Schlafly posting. [3]img
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50LT's latestimg spreeimg ofimg bashingimg RINOs(!!!!)img He still has no life!
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58Kenny pal declares himself inactive for 66 days, backtracks the following day. What more do you expect?
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60It looks like the embargo is over as Ken directly mentions this wiki right on the frontpageimg EDIT 12/13: Apparently not...img

November 2021

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30
Is Ken's gay bowel syndrome acting up again?

October 2021

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32Andrew Schlafly describes his insights about sports that are low on homosexualityimg.

Is this useful for Ken, who compiles sports, exercise and dietimg tips?

See also: Inoculation against homosexuality

September 2021

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30Ken's attention turns to circumcision and penile cancerimg.

August 2021

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50Ken goes on stike against CP mismanagement. [4]img
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48LT goes full RobSmith againimg, recruits 1990'sguyimg, and reaches 20,000 editsimg. Looks like someone needs a life...

July 2021

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70Senile Schlafly reaches a new level of stupidity. "bUt tHoSe dAmn lIbRuLS deNy InfInitY"img
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58Schlafly once againimg shills for conversion therapy. Citation notably missing, hmhmhmhmhmhmhm.....

June 2021

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59DavidB4 posts a link to The Daily Stormer while bashing Ben Shapiro.img We're not kidding you.(archived proof hereimg)
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57Schlafly desysops Karaimg again. We'll see how long this lasts...
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59LT goes full RobSmithimg with his new article on Millard Tydings.
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57Last year, Schlafly bashed Brad Parscaleimg for criticizing Jeff Sessions, and now he's bashing Sessionsimg.
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79Supreme Leader Andy says that labeling neo-Nazis as such is "name-calling".

May 2021

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67Vindictive Schlafly unpersons a CP user.

April 2021

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89 There was a harvest Moon. According to Andy, this is a "setback for atheism."img
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47Karajou returns to the foldimg
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79Schlafly de-sysops Karajou.img

March 2021

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57LT says CP is currently being infiltrated by some apparent Otisburg wandal disguising themselves cleverly enough to fool everyone except him.img Remind you much of this guy?
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59Gentleman Ken: "I AM NOT OBSESSED, I AM NOT OBSESSED, I AM NOT OBSESSED"
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57So much for owning the libs: Conservapedia's Alexa ranking rapidly tumbles. Is this the end for them?

February 2021

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68RobSmith quits.img
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56LTimg becomesimg Kendollimg 2.0img.
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68It's snowing in the Deep Red State of Texas, and the unregulated power grid has collapsed. Luckily, Andy's on the case, blaming the global warming "hoax," and liberals.img

January 2021

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40Karajou updates his bio.img
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68Conservapedia’s security certificate expiresimg, causing many people to be unable to access the site without warnings, and mobile users to be unable to access it period. Update: As of 31 January, the site is once again completely inaccessible.
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66A fightimg breaks out between RobS, Pokiera1, and Northwest over a supposed bill to 'persecute conservatives' (it's to arrest Capitol stormers) Highlights include RobS calling Northwest a 'right wing extremist', a collapse box saying "Warning: Take it to RW or whatever hole you crawled out of", and freaking out about reverting the edits of a sysop.
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69CP: DO NOT TRUST QANON!!!!!!!img Also CP: …if Q is not thwarted, thousands of Deep state political leaders would be indicted and jailed!img
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56Signups are finally reopened again! Well, for 4 hours,imguntil someone tried to cite The Daily Stormer as a sourceimg, and spam links to Niggermania (now oversighted).
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68CP is coping hard after Inauguration Day: "There is currently no legitimate president in the White House. Joseph Biden is being claimed by the liberal media, by Big Tech and by the Democrat Party itself to be the 46th and current "president".img
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56 "echo chamber | 1937 |a figurative room with sound-reflecting walls, where people give opinions that influence no one and are heard only by other people who already have their own opinions, such as cable news talk shows" - Andy Schlafly, Founder of Conservapediaimg
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58Setback for Conservapedia's search results on a certain search engine starting with G: New editors are still not allowed to sign up for accountsimg... Isn't it time for Señor Andy to fly the white flag of surrender and shut down his blog??????/????slash/??//slashslashityslash///???slash?????? Will this help with the rapid secularization of America? Gentlemen, I hate to do it, but on behalf of all of atheistdom I declare VICTORY! Olé! Olé! Olé!
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66 Senior Sysop TerryH, who claims to be a medical doctor, says the Covid vaccine may be a "nano-technological device."img
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58 Two of the sites most active editors, Sievert 81img and United Statesimg, have been blocked; the former permanently and the latter for a really long time.
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56 Andy, January 7th 2021: Trump still has a chance to serve a second termimg. If only his inept advisers weren't standing in his way...
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58Andy apparently sees "a [real or perceived] sEhTbAhK 4 tEh VaX" at the most inconvenient of times as something desirableimg- a sure sign of a diseased mind. (He's clueless!)

December 2020

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54 From our very own Rob Smith: the smartest man alive believes the election was stolen....because Satanimg.
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56A new Conservapedian homeskolled kiddie named User:United States has been obsessing over the infamous IP abuser (or in his words, "INTERNET TERRORIST1111!!!oneoneelventy11one!!111one!!!11!!) his own PC BoN #127.0.0.1, and how our very own User:CircularReasoning "wants to go to Chicago and destroy Conservapedia!!1" (As if anyone here on RW has given a shit about CP since 2014 lmao) He is also notably self-absorbedimg and clearlyimg needsimg professionalimg help.
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30Conservapedia is still suffering from the issues of the DDoS suffered over two weeks ago.

November 2020

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41Conservapedia is currently DDoSed as of Nov. 17th... We'd bet a 3-minute block that Karajou'll blame us for it once it's over...

October 2020

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40In a breathtaking new display of moral bankruptcy, MPR celebrates an alleged fraudster and money launderer posting child porn on the internetimg. Can they go any lower?
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41Andy takes the Trustworthy Encyclopedia's Main Page Right out into the realms beyond Infowars, screeching about Deep State hospitals, hydroxychloroquine, remdesivir, and inept advisors,img after God-Emperor Trump catches the virus he said "affects virtually nobody."

June 2020

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44Andy: Attendance at Trump's Tulsa rally was so poor, because people couldn't take hydroxychloroquine to protect themselves.img These being the same people who refused to wear masks, and were expected to sign a form indemnifying the Trump campaign if they fall ill.
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41"What we've got here..." Andy claims Cool Hand Luke for conservatives: "...admires the refusal of a man ... to allow his spirit to be broken, with religious symbolism. This movie glorifies masculinity and portrays the Deep South favorably.img
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40CP continues to promote dubious and dangerous hydroxychloroquinone treatment for COVID-19[5]img[6]img despite FDA rescinding its emergency approval and questions about political influence on initial approval.[7][8]

May 2020

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46TerryH directs our attention to an adorable article proposing genocide of Palestinians.Here it isimg

April 2020

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44 In today's episode of "Conservapedia's left hand, meet the right hand", MPR hails the people trying to disrupt the lockdown as patriot heroes while, over on the covidiotimg article, they are "narcissists who care only about their own gratification and seeking attention and do not care how their self-centered behavior ends up negatively affecting other people or how bad it makes themselves look to the general public". Stalinists on speed, I tell you.
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46 Once again, Conservapedia marks the main Christian festival, the focal point of the faith itself, with the same old same old babble. Not one word about the risen Christ and the redemption of mankind. Maybe the MSM is fully covering the resurrection, eh?
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45The Hill: Why Africa is at Risk of a Catastrophe (Rural Africans with no access to food or health care are ripe for riots. And with no testing, we have no idea about infections.) Andy's synopsis: See libs? Chloroquine works!img

March 2020

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46Andy: Anthony Fauci is “obstructionist”.img Update: Yikes. That's too crazy for Kenimg and Rob (!)img and - holy shit - the reanimated corpse of Ed muthafuckin' Poor!img

February 2020

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44RobS knows a good editor cuts unnecessary words, as in: "In 2020 some guy tweeted that Stern vowed, in 2008, to never vote Democrat again, eight years before he supported Hillary." It's pretty much the same.img (The tweet.)
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46Pokeria1 duz history, faceplants spectacularly: "And don't get me started on Oliver Cromwell, who ... was pretty much the reason why King Henry VIII (!) took a slide into totalitarianism with his trying to have a male heir with his War of the Roses (!!)"img

January 2020

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44Just when Conservapedia seemed to be entering a death spiral of dullness, our very own RobS gives a stunning display of Dunning Kruger syndromeimg. Keep up the good work, Rob. You could be the next Jerome Corsi.
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46 Andy is neither weird, obsessive, nor rigid in his thinking. "Setback... for Never-Trumpers!img to Never-Trumpers!img to liberal narrative of "toxic masculinity"!img for vaccine police and Big Pharma!img to pro-aborts!img for conspiracy deniers!img for gun control!img for Dem Establishment!img for communism!img for global warming hoax!img for potheads!img for global warming hoax!img for the liberal media and Nancy Pelosi!img to MeToo movement!img for global warming alarmism!img for Nike's pro-communist globalism!img to Overrated Sports Stars!img for feminists!img for Never Trumpers!img to liberal censorship!img to global warming hoax!img for Darwinists!img for Never Trumpers!img

December 2019

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44Conservative values: Andy faps over Eddie Gallagher's manly war crimes and "lovely" wife,img whilst the Saudi regime gets a finger-wagging for the "apparently commanded" Khashoggi killing.img

November 2019

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46Pokeria1 says the quiet part out loud: Why not just nuke them out of existence and wipe out Islam, which if you ask me is probably the better strategy knowing that both Shia and Sunni variants are pure evil?img Now with added fascist delusions of grandeur! Once the Communists are destroyed, I'm making sure that in its place is a Christian theocracy...img

October 2019

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44Trump, in his great & unmatched wisdom, decides to enrage the jurors in his impending impeachment trial. Blackout drunk on the Kool-Aid, Andy declares victory: Massive setback to neocons and other globalists: Trump is pulling U.S. troops out of Syria.img

September 2019

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46 Andy: The Pagan NFLimg shows how little they care about the sport by firing an accused rapist.img

August 2019

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44 Andy: Liberals hate chess, because feminists can't explain why all the best players are men.img

July 2019

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46Nobs turns the stupid up to 11: Science is little different than reading the past performance of a horse at the race track. It gives you good clues, but can't forecast if the horse is going to twist an ankle today.img

June 2019

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44Andy duz law, gets pwned: Accordingly, Plaintiff Andrew Schlafly's Second Amended Complaint with Class Action is DISMISSED, in its entirety, with prejudice.
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46Conservapedia attemptsimg to set itself up as a Very Serious Publication and is therefore very truthful. How dare we use humor of any sort in our articles!

May 2019

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44"'Lime Green' was named after limes... The Bible doesn't mention anything about lime green."img Thanks, Conservapedia. Fascinating information.

April 2019

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46Andy draws the obvious parallel between the Dow Jones and Mainpageleft:img "The strength of this basket of these 30 stocks as an investment tool is in the additional productivity of having multiple approaches to a challenge. Our Mainpageleftimg, with its collection of roughly 135 key entries, illustrates a similar approach to developing helpful insights."
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54The recent release of a black hole photograph goes over with Overlord Schlafly about as well as one might expectimg. Using coloration to show infrared is "dishonesty", and his misquoting Stephen Hawking naturally proves his point that his god is more provable than black holes. So, where was that photograph of God again?

March 2019

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46Question Evolution is back!img, along with Ken's claim to be a team of editors!
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44 Our very own pet Conservapedian and world class bullshitter writes an article of his usual encylcopedic standard on the Christchurch terrorist attack.img Funny how, despite calling it a left wing attack, his subconscious won't let him call it terrorism.
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46According to Ken, atheism is apparently linked to Alzheimer'sConservlogo late april.pngimg. Seriously, how the actual fuck did he come up with this?!

February 2019

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44Setback for atheism: Saint Valentine's Day increases in popularity.img Andy sets the bar for parodists even higher.
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46
⛧😈⛧
Article on "Paganism": In modern times, pagan rituals include the Super Bowl, certain public school events, and even misnamed holidays like "President's Day."img
Article on "Demonic": An prominent element of uncertainty, as found in football, seems to enable demonic influences to thrive.img (FSTDT link)
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54
Ken PRESENTS ...
Everything You Always Wanted to Know About John Wayne's Bowels*
(*But Were Afraid to Ask)
"Gentlemen, John Wayne's bowels were as straight as an arrow. All true conservatives have straight bowels. Did John Wayne coroner's report show any gay bowel syndrome? No autopsy was ever done on "The Duke" because nobody ever challenged the straightness of John Wayne's bowels."img
See also: Inoculation against homosexuality

January 2019

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46
Several parables in the Bible foreshadow the insight of quantum entanglement about paired photons having opposite spin, by contrasting two men in their relationship with God.img The Prodigal Son contrasts two brothers, two churchgoers are contrasted in Luke 18:9–14, and two brothers are further contrasted in Luke 21:28-31. (FSTDT link)
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44 VargasMilan makes irony meters explodeimg everywhere. Surely he is not a deep cover troll?
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46Damn. Killer of Davis, CA cop was not a Muslim. But California has legal pot, so that must be it.img
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54Conservative surpasses 200,000 editsimg, making him responsible for around 13.6% of all edits on Conservapedia (1,470,640 total).
See also: Conservapedia Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (COCD)
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56Increasingly liberal! Andy marches Mormonism out into the parade groundimg, rips offs its epaulettesimg and breaks its sword across his kneeimg.