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Light iron-age reading
The Bible
Icon bible.svg
Gabbin' with God
Baal demands you guess where this finger has been!

Baal is a title used in the Bible which could refer to any local god. Literally the word simply means “master” or “lord” and consequently every local tribe would have their own “Baal.”

While the ancient Israelites were on their way from Egypt to the promised land (and after they arrived) they were constantly looking for ways to get into Baal's good books — but exactly why Baal was such an attractive deity for the ancient Israelites is a bit of a puzzle. They had ample evidence of the existence of God as he had killed thousands of them personally while they were on their way to the promised land and after they arrived.

Oh. Ahh, yes I see.

Baal and Christianity[edit]

He turns up in another incarnation as Ba‘al Zebûb (literally “Lord of the Flies”), and subsequently as Beelzebub, again proving that Christians can't spell. It is likely that the Hebrews corrupted the name "Ba'al Zebul", which means "Lord of Heaven".

Later Christians converted him into the demon Baal — an assistant of Satan, or Satan himself.

Glenn Beck and Rabbi Daniel Lapin claim that "secular fundamentalism" (whatever that is) is due to the influence of Baal.[1] Assuming that they're right, of course, that must mean other gods exist besides the God of the Bible. Huh.


The Carthaginian general Hannibal was named after Baal. His name means "the grace of Baal".