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Serpent seed doctrine

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The serpent seed doctrine is the knowledge of how to grow snakes for handling belief that Eve literally had sexual intercourse with the serpent in the Garden of Eden, leading to offspring.

How can sexual intercourse between a human and a snake take place, you ask? Ah, well, it happened before The Fall, so God hadn't gotten mad at the serpent yet… so the serpent wasn't "crawling in the dust" yet… so the serpent was actually pretty much human-shaped, like you or I. So Eve bangs the serpent, and in the course of time produces Cain — literally the spawn of Satan (although nowhere in the Bible does it say that the serpent was Satan). Abel, on the other hand (and Seth later) would have been a child of Adam (and thus a grandchild of God, I suppose).

Serpent seed believers apparently differ on the story from that point on. Did Cain's offspring get wiped out in the Great Flood? Were they the Kenites, a tribe living in the greater Canaan metropolitan area during the Exodus? Did they interbreed with their more godly neighbors, so that everyone alive today has a little piece of original sin in them? Or are only some of us *cough*Democrats*cough* Satan-spawn, and others (say, Southern Baptists) pure sons of Adam?

Prominent Serpent Seed believers[edit]