Conservapedia talk:What is going on at CP?/Archive124

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Fool me once ...[edit]

Tash loses sysop light. See what you've done MikeSalter Fretful?   .  Violence is the last refuge of the incompetent 21:50, 15 March 2009 (EDT)

One of the user rights is nsTeam1_talkRW. They have their own WIGO on us? ENorman 23:14, 15 March 2009 (EDT)
Of course they do, since us evildoers on RW are the source of ALL wandalism on CP. --Gulik 01:12, 16 March 2009 (EDT)
I'm guessing it stands for Read Write, but perhaps you were joking.

Andy's grading[edit]

I think there's nothing I hate more about Assfly's than the way he grades the homework of anyone who's actually smart (luckily it's rare that he has to do this). I mean, obviously student 18 is one of us, but he really should admit that this guy knows much more than he does about this subject. He basically says to his best student "if you want to understand scholasticism, don't read Summa Theologica, read my lectures!" If I ever meet Andy I will probably seriously kick him in the nuts. DickTurpis 22:18, 15 March 2009 (EDT)

frankly, if I knew one of my "students" were there just to make fun of me, I'd do the same thing, even if it made me "more the fool" in a sense. It's not like he doesn't know 18 is a spoof, so why would he treat that "student" with any respect at all?--Sun mowse.pngEn attendant Godot"Such is life." 22:44, 15 March 2009 (EDT)
I dunno, if I were a teacher/professor, the parodist/troublemaker would probably get more of my attention, and perhaps even respect. Like we try to do here on RW (and usually don't do very well), when the people who disagree with us turn up, they are our greatest asset (since echo chambers rarely create new "insights"). ħumanUser talk:Human 23:19, 15 March 2009 (EDT)
Yes, but you are logical, and think that most of what is taught as "history" in schools, is relativily speaking, "ok", if not brilliant. People like andy think that they are right, but think that without fact to back them up... so they live in fantasy land. They don't like people who challenge their thinly held, gossamer like beliefs.--Sun mowse.pngEn attendant Godot"Such is life." 00:15, 16 March 2009 (EDT)
Which is why Tim needs to grace us with his presence. WE MISS YOU TIM, COME BAAAAACCK~!!!! ENorman 00:16, 16 March 2009 (EDT)
You'd have something if his behaviour was limited to the spoof, but he was just as much an ass to ReneeStJ, who at that point had no connection to RW. What horrifies me is that Andy marks down the absolute wrong things while proving just how little he knows, and just how terribly stubborn he is about it. The man has no fucking clue what a Nation-State is, nor a Nation, yet he preaches to me, a guy with years of study in history and political studies, about ignorance. His response absolutely floored me: "England had a King. There was a State under that King such that in the early 1500s the King established a national church. Enough said." Yes, there was a State. Henry established a STATE church. Great ironclad logic, dipshit. Minus 3 for naming my favourite aspect of Scholasticism, Aquinas' theology, like he asked. And the coup de grace: "two is several." I quote the dictionary: "Several: Being of a number more than two or three but not many." His response to H7 is simply incomprehensible. PubliusTalk 00:24, 16 March 2009 (EDT)
I think your work may come to some sort of fruition. The intelligent responses to his questions make his grading comments look like oversimplified, unprofessional nonsense. I think that if any student or parent (for whatever reason) saw the page, they'd at least consider the possibility that Andy's a fool who has no idea what he's talking about. They might also notice how terse Andy is with students who deviate from his thinking. The less people "educated" by him, the better. -- JArneal 02:48, 16 March 2009 (EDT)
Quoth the Assfly, ...there are more characteristics to the architecture than "stunning complexity." Yeah, apparently like the "many windows]" that let light in, hurrah for goth arcitecture, full marks! Do you physically have to blow Andy for a passing grade? --JeevesMkII The gentleman's gentleman at the other site 05:04, 16 March 2009 (EDT)
No you just need to parrot Andy back to himself, using language that would seem too simplistic for the simple English Wikipedia, so as not to cause Andy to feel intellectually inferior. - User \scriptstyle(6\sum_{n=1}^{\infty}n^{-2})^{1/2} 05:12, 16 March 2009 (EDT)
To Andy, that has the same effect as a blowjob. "You agree with me? Oh, yes! Yes! Yes!" MDB 07:32, 16 March 2009 (EDT)
Er, <utter disgusting warning>just as Bill Maher characterizes Darth Cheney as a guy who married the first girl to give him a handjob <ok, you were warned, don't blame me if you keep reading>, does anyone think that Schlafly idiot has ever had a blowjob?</utter disgusting over, too late, you read it.> ħumanUser talk:Human 02:56, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
If one includes autofellation I'm a gonna hafta go with A-YES!" After all, what could be MOAR! conservative than doing (it for) yourself? 03:07, 17 March 2009 (EDT) CЯacke®

"Create account" still locked, right?[edit]

CP still has account creation locked, right? I suppose so, since I see "Log in" instead of "Log in / create account"... but then how are people still creating accounts? Is it being turned on for just a few hours a day and I'm missing it, or what? --Marty 03:04, 16 March 2009 (EDT)

CP goes in to what we call night mode when Andy goes to bed, and only comes back to life when Andy is up and around again. During night mode, you can't create new accounts and peons can't edit. Basically, since Andy doesn't trust anyone you have to await his pleasure before being allowed in. Check back sometime during the day, EST. --JeevesMkII The gentleman's gentleman at the other site 04:37, 16 March 2009 (EDT)

the lull before the lulz[edit]

I've just caught up on the last few days of wigocp and I just want to say - i think that slowdown in cp drama last week was just a building up of quality lulz ready to burst for the weekend, like some sort of fundie fart. I have laughed like a madman all the way down this talk page, it's just too much. Petition to auto-replace every instance of "two" on this wiki to "several". Runderful 07:13, 16 March 2009 (EDT)

I dare someone to replace the phrase 'two of every kind' in their flood/ark articles to 'several of every kind' - Lardashe

Is Andy Stupid?[edit]

Is Andy Schlafly stupid?

No, I don't think so, at least not if we define stupid as "lacking intelligence". Obviously, the man has intelligence -- unintelligent people don't get Bachelor's Degrees in Electrical Engineering1 followed by a Harvard Law Degree, including working at the Law Review.

I think his problem is not lack of intelligence, but inability to apply his intelligence -- or (geek moment here), in Dungeons and Dragons terms, he has high Intelligence, but low Wisdom. He's so biased by his own pre-conceived notions ("conservative = good! liberal = bad!", "I'm a conservative, therefore anyone who disagrees with me is a liberal!" etc etc etc ad infinitum ad nauseam...) he can't use his intelligence to form reasonable arguments, even if he's trying to argue conservative viewpoints.

1 Acknowledgment of bias: my degree is in Electrical Engineering, so it is a point of personal pride to think it requires intelligence to earn a BSEE. — Unsigned, by: MDB / talk / contribs

I'm secretly hoping he turns out to be the world's greatest and most committed troll ever possible. The only thing that stands in the way of this possibility is that he teaches warps kids. Runderful 08:29, 16 March 2009 (EDT)
That's the thought I've had regarding Andy being a troll: if he's trolling by teaching kids, that's evil. Trying to confuse adults by parodying fundamentalist Christian conservatism is one thing, messing with the education of children is beyond the pale. MDB 08:41, 16 March 2009 (EDT)

Andrew Schlafly:

What's that in Warhammer? Totnesmartin 08:39, 16 March 2009 (EDT)

M - 4
WS - 2
BS - 10
S - 3
T - 6
W - 5
I - 9
A - 3
Ld - 4

These are just estimates, but I declare them to be 95% accurate.-- Kriss AkabusiAAAWOOOGAAAR!!1 08:45, 16 March 2009 (EDT)

If we assign each one just a mere 10% probability, then, Runderful 08:55, 16 March 2009 (EDT)
Warhammer? I've not played that since college, and my only memory of it involves this exchange:
Me: I toss the waitress a gold piece and tell her "keep the change."
GM: She looks at you, amazed. "Thank you, sir!"
Me: I just tipped her a week's salary, didn't I?
GM: No, more like a year's.

9 for initiative? Hmm. and 10 for BS is right, for current definitions of BS.

Andy thinks he's the Emperor of Man, but he's just an Ogryn. --Barikada.
In terms of Final Fantasy Tactics:
Andy (Mediator)
Talk Abilities:Praise,Threaten,Preach,Solution(never works),Insult,Mimic Daravon(for the homeshcool kids)
Secondary (Calculator)
Math Skills: (all, but never work)--Nate River 12:50, 16 March 2009 (EDT)
No Finger Guard? NightFlare 01:36, 17 March 2009 (EDT)

D&D? <gamesnob>How unrealistic</gamesnob>. Use GURPS, and give him Delusion (All Liberals are EVIL), Stubbornness, Fanaticism (Conservativism), and Intolerance. (Plus Patron (mom).) --Gulik 13:46, 16 March 2009 (EDT)

I can't buy him as a GURPS character. I mean who the hell takes all those disadvantages, and spends so little on skills? It's like he's min-minning or something. --Kels 16:42, 16 March 2009 (EDT)
Excuse me if I pass over all this gaming cruft and address the original question. I don't believe Andy is stupid in the sense of having a low IQ - you don't get engineering and law degrees if you have learning difficulties. However, just remembering stuff and being analytical about things doesn't necessarily make you a well-rounded, likable individual. Andy exhibits a very low emotional quotient - the ability to empaphise with others or see things from their point of view. Also he displays incredible arrogance; the conviction that he is always right and everyone else is wrong is a most distasteful trait which has been exemplified by the bastards at the heart of the recent financial crisis (or at the risk of invoking Godwin - Adolf Hitler). Yes, they were clever enough to find ways to make lots of money but this was done out of selfishness and with disdain for the masses. Really great people have a degree of humility and concern for their fellow (wo)man, something that Schlafly does not posess and that is what makes him such a bad teacher. He does not engage his students, he preaches at them. The reason he has failed at everything is his reluctance to admit to errors or see other points of view, something probably inherited from his reptile of a mother.  Lily Ta, wack! 15:26, 18 March 2009 (EDT)
I believe that it is not so much a lack of knowledge. To me, it is a lack of problem solving skills. The way that Andy teaches is appears to be nothing more than the students regurgitating what Andy has said. Such answers require memory, not thought. Give Andy a problem that requires problem solving, not facts/statistics/quotes/opinions, and watch him fail--Nate River 13:52, 19 March 2009 (EDT)
It's more than that. Andy unquestionably has a severe lack of knowledge in these subjects, which wouldn't be a problem, except that he's teaching. I can't speak to his intelligence, but there's a fundamental difference between him and every scholar I've ever met: scholars are interested in learning. They may be the most egotistical, arrogant jackasses you've ever met, but they rely on the work and knowledge of others around and before them to build up an expertise. Andy, at every turn, denies the authority of every single expert imaginable; he only cites them if they conform with his preconceptions. For god's sake, he debated with RJJ when he was clearly out of his league on LBJ, and on the Illinois Constitution before that. He is simply not interested in learning, except where "insights" add to his range of crackpot theories, because learning presumes he's not omniscient. PubliusTalk 14:08, 19 March 2009 (EDT)

Rule of law[edit]

Andy sez that Rule of Law is a conservative word not recognised by the dictionary. I'd like to refer him to the Oxford English Dictionary no less, which says:

c. rule of law: (a) with a and pl. : a valid legal proposition; (b) with the : a doctrine, deriving from theories of natural law, that in order to control the exercise of arbitrary power, the latter must be subordinated to impartial and well-defined principles of law; (c) with the : spec. in English law, the concept that the day-to-day exercise of executive power must conform to general principles as administered by the ordinary courts.
--PsyGremlinWhut? 08:42, 16 March 2009 (EDT)
That's from Oxford. That's a British school. Conservapedia uses good American dictionaries. OQED. MDB 08:54, 16 March 2009 (EDT)
Presumably his dictionary looks more like this. --Just passing by 11:25, 16 March 2009 (EDT)

Andy as a D&D Character[edit]

This time, without the random number generator.

This is mostly based on first edition, because that's what I remember best...

Andrew Layton Schlafly, Human1 3rd Level Cleric2
Lawful Annoying
STR: 103
DEX: 103
CON: 103
INT: 154
WIS: 55
CHA: 46

1 Possible half-orc. Undetermined, but just look at his mother. C'mon...
2 Believes himself to be a 30th level paladin
3 Middle aged, sedentary job, looks a little flabby, but no obvious health issues
4 Well-educated
5 Completely unable to apply intelligence beyond the most simple concepts
6 Only able to attract a handful of henchmen, and many are secretly plotting against him. They don't call him "The Assfly" for nothing

History: Born to a very minor noble family in the land of Conservia, Andrew has largely coasted throughout life based on his family.

He studied Electrical Spells at a Tower of Wizardry, but considering he has not practiced such magery in nearly two score years, most believe he could not cast a Create Light spell without a Wand of Flashlight.

Later, he studied the Law, daring to venture into the dreaded Dungeon of Harvard, but the key part of his studies there was his first encounter with his arch nemesis, Barack of Obama, who Andrew refers to as Barack the Socialist Muslim of Kenya, for reason that only make sense to himself. Note that the adversarial relationship is definitely not mutual; Barack may remember Andrew, but concerns himself with far more important things now, like solving the economic problems of an entire nation, defeating the forces of al Qaeda, restoring the tattered reputation of his land, and what he's going to have for lunch.

He has attempted to use his and his family's position to launch one grand crusade after another, all of which have been defeated by small ripostes from the neighboring of Liberalstan.

His latest wacky schemeplan is Fortress Conservapedia, an attempt to counter the far far far far far... larger Castle Wikipedia. (Note that Schlafly insists Castle Wikipedia is being constructed entirely by Liberalstan, but most adventurers who have been there report that, while Liberalstan has influenced it, many different realms have added blocks to its imposing walls.) While he insists that his castle will overtake his enemy's within five years, most outside observers feel that the chances of that happening are roughly on par with that of the Children's Crusade retaking the Holy Land.

Equipment: Wand of Statistics: By holding this wand and speaking the magic word "PIDOOMA", Andrew can produce numbers that attempt to prove his point. For targets with Wisdom under 10, they will believe his arguments for 4d6 rounds. For those of higher wisdom, they will respond "huh?" and move on.
Largely Defensive Weapon of Gun: Causes 10d100 damage, but can only be used if Andrew is attacked first.

Ability: Andrew is completely immune to the spells Logical Argument and Well Sourced Facts. Those who attempt to cast those spells on Andrew have a 50% chance of suffering from Extreme Frustration for 1d6 rounds, leaving them unable to do anything other than continue to cast those spells on Andrew, who will still be immune to them. Note that every time those spells are cast on Andrew, there is another 50% chance of another 1d6 rounds of Extreme Frustration. (Yes, this could theoretically continue forever, however Schlafly usually eventually decides to stop using the ability and wander away, refusing to participate in melee any further).

Disability: The sound of a Bugler induces terror in Andrew, leaving him unable to do anything beyond look around in paranoia for 3d6 rounds. MDB 10:05, 16 March 2009 (EDT)

ADDITION: Disability: Andrew is unable to see trolls, even if his henchmen point them out to him. Trolls are only visible to him when they stand before him, yelling "I'm a troll, stupid!" MDB 10:05, 16 March 2009 (EDT)


Never played D&D, but this is funny.-- Kriss AkabusiAAAWOOOGAAAR!!1 09:56, 16 March 2009 (EDT)

Haha, that is too hilarious. But doesn't a cleric require a wisdom of at least 10 or 11 to cast spells? And I like his alignment. My friends and I like to give characters from TV shows and movies alignments and our conclusion for Will Turner from Pirates was that he is neutral-stupid. FernoKlump What the fuck Mr. Assfly??? That bastard DeanS deleted my petition!

09:59, 16 March 2009 (EDT)

Thank you, thank you. I do have my moments. I guess this comes from years of reading "Giants in the Earth", the old Dragon Magazine column where the adapted characters from fantasy novels to AD&D terms.

As far as requiring a Wisdom of ten to cast spells.... well, I didn't give Andy any spells, just special abilities. (Okay, I didn't think of that till you pointed it out, but I think I escaped it quite nicely, huh?) MDB 10:05, 16 March 2009 (EDT)

Doesn't this call for a new wiki project akin to Conservapedia:Liberals:_The_Garnering, write the GURPS: Conservapedia source book? --JeevesMkII The gentleman's gentleman at the other site 10:17, 16 March 2009 (EDT)
It is kind of fitting that Andy is a cleric who can't cast spells. FernoKlump What the fuck Mr. Assfly??? That bastard DeanS deleted my petition! 10:38, 16 March 2009 (EDT)
Come on, Andy obviously has a higher DEX than that. Just look at how he dodges every question, critique and argument! And his "arguments" always result in a critical hit! --GTac 10:45, 16 March 2009 (EDT)


Because you people have foolishly encouraged me with your praise, I've turned this into its own Fun page. Please add your further comments to its corresponding talk page.

Help me, please! I titled my article Fun:Andy Schlafly as an Advanced Dungeons and Dragons Character, but that didn't put it into the Fun namespace. How can I change its namespace? MDB 10:50, 16 March 2009 (EDT)

Guns prevent AIDS, so saith CP...[edit]

Or something like that. I mean, really, come one. Z3rotalk 11:10, 16 March 2009 (EDT)

I read that a couple of times myself before WIgoing it.... I think what he's getting at is that the Democrats cared more about taking away guns then preventing AIDS.... The irony in that is dripping... I mean, for the past eight years, Bush has cut funding to groups that would distribute condoms and educate the masses in favor of the old "God wants you to zip it up." I must say, though, it's nice to see CP worried about us darkies for once. SirChuckBI have very poor judgement 11:56, 16 March 2009 (EDT)
But only worried in how it relates to liberals and spending. Sorta counts, I guess. Z3rotalk 12:05, 16 March 2009 (EDT)
You've got to wonder how someone like Andy would propose to stop this epidemic. Moar abstinence-only education...BECUZ IT WORKS! LALALALALA Neveruse513 12:51, 16 March 2009 (EDT)
Pretty much... There was an old E-mail joking that was floating around a few years back about the "GOP platform for (insert year here)" one of the items was "If you keep condoms out of schools, kids won't have sex." I thought that was a pretty good assessment of the mentality of the religious idiots who think Abstinence only education works. Personally, I like the unstated implication that it would be better for black America if everybody had unrestricted access to guns.... TK, I know you read this, and you're a fucking idiot. SirChuckBI have very poor judgement 12:55, 16 March 2009 (EDT)
Here in Chicago, we just had the 28th student killed this school year. I'm sure more guns is the answer. Z3rotalk 13:12, 16 March 2009 (EDT)
These children need MOAR GUNS!!!! EddyP 13:14, 16 March 2009 (EDT)
You see Zero, if Chicago issues everybody their own personal glock when they reached the age of seven and told their parents to be sure and teach them gun safety, the world would be fine. God knows that, as we live in a calm, rational society, everybody would use their guns only in self defense and never for retaliation, intimidation or in anger. SirChuckBI have very poor judgement 13:25, 16 March 2009 (EDT)
You're so right. Forget the push to tighten gun regulations in the city; glocks for everyone! I'm now a conservative, thanks to your brilliant insight. If only there was a website that catered to my new world view...Z3rotalk 13:37, 16 March 2009 (EDT)
I believe the Mexican carry combined with guns made in the USA with shoddy safety catches is a very effective tool at preventing the spread of sexually transmitted diseases. After all, it's pretty hard to have sex if you've shot your own cock off. --JeevesMkII The gentleman's gentleman at the other site 14:44, 16 March 2009 (EDT)
By the way, nice little Red Herring by the newspaper there. **west africa** has no worse an aids problem than any other 3rd world nation/3rd world region. It's *South africa* that has the AIDS epidemic. Why not just say "has a worse aids rate than China" or "has a worse aids rate than Vietnam" or any other poor nation. sighs... --Sun mowse.pngEn attendant Godot"Such is life." 17:29, 16 March 2009 (EDT)
The same reason that everyone yells Socialists at Democrats. They're capitalizing on people's ignorance. Most people don't know what a Socialist stands for, but they know that "Socialist" is really close to "Communist" and Communist is bad.... Same principle. SirChuckBI have very poor judgement 18:49, 16 March 2009 (EDT)

A thought about that philanthropic aid[edit]

Teacake closes down that talk page section by throwing in a curve ball praising Bush's record on aid to Ethiopia. I was minded to dig through the bookshelves to find something I had read regarding the subject, and the truth about those vast $$ figures, and eventually found it in the (excellent) Monbiot tome, "Bring On The Apocalypse: 6 Arguments For Global Justice" (p.121):

Sometimes it doesn’t go to countries at all, but straight to the manufacturers. A US government website boasts that "the principal beneficiary of America’s foreign assistance programs has always been the United States. Close to 80 percent of the U.S. Agency for International Development’s contracts and grants go directly to American firms."'
A doctor working in Gondar hospital in Ethiopia wrote to me recently to spell out what this means. The hospital has none of the basic textbooks on tropical diseases it needs. But it does have 21 copies of an 800-page volume called “Aesthetic Facial Surgery” and 24 volumes of a book called "Opthalmic Pathology". There is no opthalmic pathologist in training in Ethiopia. The poorest nation on earth, unsurprisingly, has no aesthetic plastic surgeons. The US had spent $2m on medical textbooks which American publishers hadn’t been able to sell at home, called them aid and dumped them in Ethiopia.

One has to open their eyes and look into the true meaning of things, Teacake, especially with the majority of the press/publications in the western world consisting of pure bullshit spin. I hope you do. You won't regret it. Godspeed. Fox 03:53, 18 March 2009 (EDT)

Thanks for that insight Fox.  Lily Ta, wack! 15:37, 18 March 2009 (EDT)

What's Wrong with Andy?[edit]

At least twice in less than a week, Andy has corrected himself in response to input from readers.

Is he slipping? What went wrong with him?

My initial thought was that his poor wife gave him "the annual", but then I remembered its Lent, and Andy would never partake of carnal pleasures during such a holy time. MDB 11:54, 16 March 2009 (EDT)

Yeah, but in each, he only offered a half apology, basically saying "I was right, but not as right as I could have been". That doesn't count. Z3rotalk 12:07, 16 March 2009 (EDT)
It's lent! To whom and for how long? Mick McT 12:49, 16 March 2009 (EDT)
Is it a coincidence that the "corrections" are germane modifications to incredibly small matters? One correction comes from Hsmom about a common assumption, while the other plays into months of separating liberal words from the conservative list. He won't be "slipping" until he accepts a serious correction, like the existence of pre-20th century genocide or pre-Christian humour. This fits really well into the image I've gotten about many conservative Christians: they consider themselves perfect and infallible, but they also believe and call themselves humble and flawed. How better to reconcile these things than to accept tiny corrections of little importance? PubliusTalk 12:58, 16 March 2009 (EDT)
Is that an image purely made by your observations of Andy? Does he make me, a conservative Christian, look like an idiot? I suspected that such a thing might happen, and wrote a little about it on my userpage, but jeez. He just screws it all up.-- JArneal 18:07, 16 March 2009 (EDT)

Breaking News: Muslin on Xtian naughtiness[edit]

Jpatt reports that "U.K. Christian minister Noble Samuel of the hour-long live Asian Gospel Show is beaten by Muslims." [1] Pssst. Jpatt, way to go on leaving out the "‘faith hate’ assault" part because, as we all know, talking about why Christian persecution is the only true hate crime is confusing to the homosexuals and Jews. CPNuisance 13:16, 16 March 2009 (EDT)

Move down scandal![edit]

This is Conservapedia and we don't imitate liberal placement bias. We made ours up all on our own. [2] Newty's philandering was part of his personal life, which is at the bottom of the article, not his professional life, which is closer to the top. Duh. And don't write it as a personal attack [3].CPNuisance 13:47, 16 March 2009 (EDT)

Seeing how the GOP was on a serious "Family Values" kick during Newt's reign, I'd say his noxious hypocrisy is worth mentioning early on. --Gulik 13:50, 16 March 2009 (EDT)

Mental problems[edit]

I contributed. and I most definitely suffer from mental issues, so you are factually wrong, Andy. Course, i'm fully convinced you have a myrid of Mental disorders. Saying "no I don't" won't really cure them. but good shot. denial is the first step to recovery...orsomethinglikethat.--Sun mowse.pngEn attendant Godot"Such is life." 17:04, 16 March 2009 (EDT)

I loled so hard that my boss yelled at me. Keep up the good work Andy! Z3rotalk 17:11, 16 March 2009 (EDT)
Yeah, no admitted mental problems. Aside from the multiple issues of Andy, TK and  K e n  D o l l , who could fill a Bedlam or two just between the three of them. Koward is just an easily-led failure, and PJR's just plain easily led, so they probably don't count. --Kels 17:13, 16 March 2009 (EDT)
Combined with the very odd "Conservative triumph" bit further up, I think that Andy finally realized that almost the entire opposition is finally gone (Thanks to Senior Sysop Starscr-... I mean... TK, who never did anything wrong and was always on Andy's side), so he can go all-out with his increasingly silly claims. --Sid 17:18, 16 March 2009 (EDT)
they're comming to take me away, haha,hoho,hehe to the funny farm...--Sun mowse.pngEn attendant Godot"Such is life." 17:23, 16 March 2009 (EDT)
So Sid, you're suggesting that Andy's finally buying into  K e n D o l l ' s  delusion assumption that the more people say "WTF is wrong with you", that means they're smarting from you being so incredibly RIGHT? --Kels 17:32, 16 March 2009 (EDT)
Conservapedia: 84 million in page views, and 0 in mental problems by its contributors. Learn and teach the truth, and it will set you free. Your only regret will be that you waited so long before opening your mind to it.
I knew that reading CP alone would give me all the information I would ever need - but now, it stabilizes my mental health! I'm anxiously waiting for the incoming reports of blind people who could hear again after reading CP ! larronsicut fur in nocte 17:36, 16 March 2009 (EDT)
I'm suggesting that once the liberals are away, the Andy will play. --Sid 19:24, 16 March 2009 (EDT)

Personally, I think a better ad would be a pic of Andy and his kids with the line "Conservapedia: It'll get you laid". Talk about giving hope to the hopeless! --Kels 17:41, 16 March 2009 (EDT)

BTW, how long can Hsmom pretend that there is any sanity left in Aschlafly? I'm waiting for hew answer to this... larronsicut fur in nocte 17:47, 16 March 2009 (EDT)

That one is odd - note how she pre-empted him calling her "clueless"? Also, in his whacked-out reply, he doesn't offer a single fact or reason why that "today in history" item is interesting in any way (at least TK tried to actually defend it). ħumanUser talk:Human 16:51, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
I changed the WIGO to suit my views on the subject. I hope noone minds >.<. It was designed with the intent of hitting the watching sysops the hardest. EddyP 17:49, 16 March 2009 (EDT)
It suits your views, but doesn't hit the sysops at all (they know the joke already) and has 99% fewer lulz. Not worth it. --Kels 18:29, 16 March 2009 (EDT)

Wow, I mean just wow. I'm still a contributor to Conservapedia, seeking to bloat increase the size of Conservapedia beyond the capability of Andy to sustain it financially once Mama Syphilis Assfly keels over and I have rapid cycling Type II Bi-Polar disorder, severe paranoia & chronic insomnia. Three problems for the price of one contributor. Looks like Andy's wrong again.--stunteddwarf 18:16, 16 March 2009 (EDT)

I reckon it might be a slight wink-wink nudge-nudge that they're taking the piss. No one can think like that, can they? F**k it, I'm giving up on humanity so long as that man is alive. ArmondikoVmoral 18:23, 16 March 2009 (EDT)
What will happen when they reach 100 million page views? Just imagine Bethany: "OMG OMG OMG OMG!!!" Or Ken: "Fabulous!" (sorry for the stereotype.) --JJ4eI christen thee Sir Annoyz Alot 22:58, 16 March 2009 (EDT)
What I just love is the clumsy illiteracy, and frankly, stupidity, in the line "Conservapedia: 84 million in page views, and 0 in mental problems by its contributors." Really, what the hell prompted him to add the "0 in MP" part to his latest boast? Does he mean they score "zero" on the "mental problems" test? ħumanUser talk:Human 16:47, 17 March 2009 (EDT)

Ken's Flickr page[edit]

From  K e n  D o l l 's userpage, this is truly bizzare, he seems to be trying to conquer Flickr by adding random hitler under the username "Atheism" BadgerBadger 17:41, 16 March 2009 (EDT)

Link? Totnesmartin 18:54, 16 March 2009 (EDT)
[4] Mei is useful. This is operation wtf. Mei 18:57, 16 March 2009 (EDT)
He's trying (and badly failing) to make himself look like a crowd by taking yet another alias and then claiming himself as a source. The same way he took on a number of false names in order to spam any number of message boards and blogs. Problem is, he's really bad at it. --Kels 19:07, 16 March 2009 (EDT)
Yeah. And this one is especially transparent because the image had been on the CP main page for AGES, so everybody knows who it comes from. And that's not even factoring in the idiotic linkspam on the Flickr page. --Sid 19:21, 16 March 2009 (EDT)
And for gods sake, look at GFasten's user page. Come on Ken - you muppet, you can do better than that....cant you? Ace McWickedRevolt 20:44, 16 March 2009 (EDT)
GFasten seems to be an unperson. --Gulik 15:29, 19 March 2009 (EDT)
I, for one, hope they continue to play the Hitler card. It's going to backfire on them eventually. Hitler said: "My feeling as a Christian points me to my Lord and Savior as a fighter. It points me to the man who once in loneliness, surrounded only by a few followers, recognized these Jews for what they were and summoned men to fight against them." - Adolf Hitler, speech, April 12 1922, published in My New Order. THAT can't look too good for Christians methinks. Jimaginator 08:35, 17 March 2009 (EDT)


Is not long for this world. We should place bets when she gets permabanned, and by who. My vote is TK next week. Z3rotalk 17:51, 16 March 2009 (EDT)

Just amazing. And all she did was ask about celebrating bathhouses on the main page. She's the best editor they have, and they're about to drive her off. Meritocracy my ass! CorryI'll be in the hospital bar. 17:54, 16 March 2009 (EDT)
Has anyone ever dropped her an invite by e-mail? I know she's supposed to have been having e-mail problems with CP lately, but who's to say TK never sent an e-mail in the first place? More on topic, she should have seen what would happen to her as soon as CPAdmin1 left; they're very similar people IMO. EddyP 17:56, 16 March 2009 (EDT)
(EC) I find the end of that Assfly quote a little disturbing. The suggestion that she could "insulate" her children from the problems that liberal children have and that they in turn could then "insulate" their friends reminds me very much of Dawkins comparing religion to a virus. If you get sick enough you start your own wiki and attempt to "insulate" people en masse over the internets. --Horace 18:00, 16 March 2009 (EDT)
I'm amazed by the entirety of Andy's reply, seeing as it has nothing at all to do with the question HSmom asked in the first place. I wonder if he even read it. --Kels 18:03, 16 March 2009 (EDT)
Open your mind and admit that a question need not be known to answer it. If you want to learn, don't read a questio, answer one! EddyP 18:08, 16 March 2009 (EDT)
Yes, Andy's response is really, really bizarre. Her comment was, if anything, overly polite for something as strange as that bathhouse news item. -Lardashe
It's pretty stright forward. He doesn't like her, cause she challenges him. But she does so in teh single cleanest, most nice, most articulate way possible, while still being a mom and a home schooler. He has nothing on her, so every time she corrects him, politely, it galls him to the core. He's got to get something on her. He will push and push like an abusive husband, till she lashes out, then say "see, all your fault for yelling at me, wife".--Sun mowse.pngEn attendant Godot"Such is life." 18:15, 16 March 2009 (EDT)
I'm also in the "TK will ban her" camp. Andy likes to rely on his pet enforcer to do the dirty work, and TK's already homing in on her with his "Are we getting too picky here?" remark. --Sid 19:19, 16 March 2009 (EDT)

(Unindent) I think the mask may have slipped a little in this post. A "clueless mom?" If she is a gung-ho conservative home-schooling mom, why haven't her kids made an appearance yet? From Andy's perspective that has to be the most galling aspect of HSmom, her kids don't take his course...-- Antifly Now with 50% less retirement! 20:13, 16 March 2009 (EDT)

How do you know? If there are infiltrators in his course, how does he know who his students are? I know someone said some of them are real life kids he meats weakly. but if there are others that just signed up off the blog, I'm not sure you can say someone like HSmom wouldn't keep her children's identities in an internet course of dubious value from their creepy instructor.CPNuisance 20:40, 16 March 2009 (EDT)
Well, I think its safe to say that if her kids were on he wouldn't treat her the way that he does (remember he's chivalrous). I think we have established that all of the students are in his real-life class, with the exception of the student that Andy picks on.-- Antifly Now with 50% less retirement! 20:56, 16 March 2009 (EDT)
I'll bet pi-squared dollars (donated to the next RW fundraiser) that HSMom is fretful. Bondurant 05:12, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
Any takers for an over-under on the first ban length? I'm thinking 3 hours. Neveruse513 08:53, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
I think that she'll email andy and just stop contributing.   .  Violence is the last refuge of the incompetent 08:57, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
Yeah, you're probably right...but a mini parthian from hsmom would be epic. Neveruse513 09:00, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
Re: "clueless", yeah, that was epic. Could have been innocent, but... really? First off, it immunizes her against AS calling her clueless (should memorialize it at teh clueless article as "self-immunization"?), and second, if it was carefully considered (and when is hsmom anything but that?), it perhaps belies a passing knowledge with our fetishes over certain AS phrasings here. And, yeah, as I said above in another thread, AS didn't go anywhere near answering her question, he just use his quote generator and deleted the "you're clueless" from the result. ħumanUser talk:Human 16:59, 17 March 2009 (EDT)

Three-Headed Monster[edit]

This gave me a laugh.-- Antifly Now with 50% less retirement! 18:25, 16 March 2009 (EDT)

DarHitlin? Madness, who could have done such a thing? Deadly wheels Painkiller 19:00, 16 March 2009 (EDT)
Haha, I just noticed it on recent changes, it's posted on Conservative's talk page: BadgerBadger 19:05, 16 March 2009 (EDT)
In four words: "READY TO FORM VOLTRON!" --Sid 19:29, 16 March 2009 (EDT)
Meh, I liked the vehicle version better. --Kels 19:35, 16 March 2009 (EDT)
I can form head? CPNuisance 20:30, 16 March 2009 (EDT)

TK and Checkuser[edit]

Seriously, can this guy answer any question without making snarky implications about IP addresses and geolocation? (See also here for another post along the same lines from just a few sections above on that same page.) And does this count as an ad hominem argument? --Sid 18:58, 16 March 2009 (EDT)

It certainly felt like an ad hominem when he said it to me. But he was correct on every point except the moral relativist jab, which I found puzzling. I am and was a childless liberal atheist jew masquerading through deceit as a conservative. I made some rookie mistakes in that round that won't get repeated.CPNuisance 19:25, 16 March 2009 (EDT)
It is more an "I can see your house from here" style threat. - User \scriptstyle(6\sum_{n=1}^{\infty}n^{-2})^{1/2} 19:39, 16 March 2009 (EDT)
And it was creepy. I owned TK in that discussion, albeit with the largely offensive weapon of masquerading through deceit as a conservative, so it's weak of him to just end the debate with an ad hominem attack on my deceitful sock. What a predictable buzzkill.CPNuisance 20:28, 16 March 2009 (EDT)
I posted the exchange as a WIGO. Hope you don't mind. --Irrational Atheist 21:24, 16 March 2009 (EDT)
Mine was the other one, but yours is creepier. Huzzah.CPNuisance 21:38, 16 March 2009 (EDT)

This is a "terror site"!? Beautiful! PubliusTalk 21:46, 16 March 2009 (EDT)

Call the FBI! --Kels 22:12, 16 March 2009 (EDT)

Didn't somebody at one point have photos of Terry's house? I think it's time for a repost. --Marty 05:25, 17 March 2009 (EDT)

his googlemap postcode has recently been deleted for privacy/stalking so I can't see a photo being approved.   .  Violence is the last refuge of the incompetent 06:02, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
I think he's just pissed that he gave his own personal info out to the LA Times, so now any potential employers can Google him (and who doesnt these days) and get the Conservapedia connection and see how he behaves there.
Googling his name returns us as hit 3 and 3b. ħumanUser talk:Human 16:38, 18 March 2009 (EDT)

Bad taste[edit]

Is it just me, or does TK's news piece on the late Ron Silver contain a rather distasteful pun in its wording?...[5] Jammy 20:33, 16 March 2009 (EDT)

Esophageal cancer puns are always in season! Seriously, though, RIP Ron Silver, the best canceled TV villain ever. --Marty 05:29, 17 March 2009 (EDT)

World History Lecture Eight[edit]

Oh, crap, Andy's going for extra lulz.

"The King James Bible established a framework of knowledge of the English language, and it began to develop rapidly afterward." Say what?

"English is unique in its ability to develop new words, at a rate of about 1000 new words per year." Unlike, say, all other modern languages?

"English has the smallest alphabet of major languages, including its lack of accented, hybrid, and pictograph characters." Major languages, perhaps. But the Rotakas alphabet is the smallest Latin-based alphabet still in use. The German alphabet has only the ß in addition to three umlaut-able vowels; however, these characters are regularly reduced to "ss" or vowel+"e" using normal keyboards. Therefore, if Andy wants to exclude the accents of "mêlée" and "naïve", then the modern German alphabet can also have the same 26 letters lacking any accents.

"English features easy interchangeability of nouns, verbs, and adjectives, without much variance in form for pronouns and verbs. That promotes easy communication through brief, cryptic messages, the style preferred by electronic media." I'm sure that was the point of the King James Bible's promotion of the language? I'm lost to the purpose of this paragraph.

"English enjoys a powerful pipe-like quality, such that one phrase can be cut and pasted to another phrase with ease." This sounds more like Ed Poor's mental fart than anything.

"Computer-based cutting and pasting text works more efficiently in English than in many other languages, such as those using pictorial characters." I'm sure the Japanese would love to know the inefficiency of their language on computers, even though they're one of the top producers of the machines.

Just tons of stupid with a subject far out of Andy's grasp. --Irrational Atheist 22:41, 16 March 2009 (EDT)

Well, he's right on the last point. Kind of, sort of, in the most roundabout way possible. Japanese and Chinese suck for computers, because making a 256+ key keyboard is simply impractical. This difficulty is worked around using a language called Pinyin. Essentially, the user types things in in Pinyin, it's translated to the hopefully-correct Japanese, and displayed as Japanese. The More You Know! Barikada 22:58, 16 March 2009 (EDT) I'm stupid. Barikada 03:26, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
No you're not. Just ever so slightly incorrect. I didn't even know how Chinese would use a standard keyboard, you explained it.--Sun mowse.pngEn attendant Godot"Such is life." 11:31, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
I don't know why, but it finally hit me why Andy's lectures always seem to remind me of something. I couldn't quite place it until tonight. Andy is Stephen Colbert if the character were real. Sure, Andy lacks the charisma Colbert would have, but otherwise? Spot on. The stupidity, the lack of logic, the simple-mindedness and petty grudges, the truthiness - its all there. I know that Stephen Colbert based the character a bit on Stone Philips, but it makes you wonder if there wasn't a little Andy in there, too. Kaalis 00:29, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
I wonder if his cut and pasting includes infixes. Prefixes and suffixes are easy. But an infuckingfix isn't that common in english. And verbing nouns makes english teachers hemorrhage. --Shagie 00:34, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
On a side note, the suggestions I made a month ago, and confirmed by active conservapedian AlanE, remain unchanged. Philip II will just have to send his Armada before he's even born. Tough break. --CWaddell 00:37, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
God how I wish he would get off his language kick. It was bad enough when he was talking about fields I had a Highschool or 1st level college knowledge in, (and luckily for my sanity, he doesn't talk much about Indians), but now he's sorta on turf I care about... and all i want to do is bang my head. How can anyone can you say "i have to prove that I'm the best, America is the best, therefore english is the best with such gumption. (and I don't knwo about chinese, but Japanese write in Kanas on the computers, which is native to their writing system, and is phonetic. They didn't have to invent new language like Pinyin.--Sun mowse.pngEn attendant Godot"Such is life." 01:11, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
Oh, er... good catch, Godot. That'd be my fault for not doublechecking. Yeah, I was wrong, only Chinese uses Pinyin. *facepalm* Barikada 03:26, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
Factual Error
My favorite is "In Spain, Philip II (1638-1715), who was the great-grandson of Isabella and Ferdinand, worked to cleanse Spanish territories of all religions but Catholicism, and viewed Elizabeth I of England as his main rival.". As Elizabeth lived from 1533-1603, something is amiss here, an obvious error, more easily to spot as it was mentioned on the talk page Feb 23rd, 2009! Could it be that Andy mixed Philip II of Spain (1527–1598) with Louis XIV of France (1638-1715)? --larronsicut fur in nocte 03:27, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
He does have them confused: "The nature of an absolute monarch was expressed well in this famous quote attributed to Louis XIV (1527-1598), “L’etat c’est moi!” (I am the state)." - User \scriptstyle(6\sum_{n=1}^{\infty}n^{-2})^{1/2} 07:17, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
Trouble is: anyone correcting his "facts" has a fair chance of being condemned as having read it here - naughty.   .  Violence is the last refuge of the incompetent 07:35, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
I don't know, seems to me several good users who were not "regulars" here (if posters at all) have tried to correct Andy on these lectures - only to be told to shut up cause you are not as smart as the Great Andy, and if Andy wrote it, he must know about it cause he's, you know, The Great Andy. --Sun mowse.pngEn attendant Godot"Such is life." 11:21, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
I fixed the "bold for everyone who posts after this point" problem... Pesky semi-colons. The Foxhole Atheist 11:31, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
Interchangeability of word classes is a good thing? I thought verbing weirds a language (not that I'm really against it, nouning and verbing and adjectiving words can be quite fun... ::tailwags bushywolftailfully::). "Cryptic" is suddenly a good thing? Oh, and size of the alphabet is a misleading statistic if the orthography itself is crap; Andy conveniently doesn't mention the weirdness of English orthography. (Wai kant Inglish spiikers dzast spell things laik thei aar pronaunst? That wud impruuv the laivs ov houmskuuld tshildren, dzast foo van eksampl.) --wwwwolf (barks/growls) 11:56, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
I"m sure you all have seen 1 or more of these poems, but I always laugh (or cry) when I read them. .--Sun mowse.pngEn attendant Godot"Such is life." 12:05, 17 March 2009 (EDT) (I fixed the link by adding a space after it ħumanUser talk:Human)
Wi kaen't spel fownetykli bikoz ov dhiz gaadaem vaewlz! Maednys! --Purple George!YossieSpring in Fialta 16:19, 17 March 2009 (EDT)

Ahh, the great language of Chinese.

Is Andy really going to leave the myth of the Triangle trade in there without exposing it for the liebel deceit that it is? --BoredCPer 16:05, 17 March 2009 (EDT)

1)languages are not phonetic or not, Andy. WRITING SYSTEMS are. 2)hebrew is classified by even the most basic of systems as a phonetic writing system. there are really only two options, phonetic of some kinds (alphabed, syllablical and abjad) or logoio/symbolic writing. Hebrew is a phonetic language, even though it lacks vowels. reading "writing systems 101" instead of pulling things you think sound "logical" to you, might help you and your students. Course, you think that chinese is incapible of expressing new words, new ideas, etc., grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr. oh, wonder what he thinks of Sign language as a language?--Sun mowse.pngEn attendant Godot"Such is life." 19:40, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
I think Andy thinks "phonetic" means "able to be pronounced." How can Hebrew be phonetic if it has no vowels? And don't even get me started on those Eastern European languages! --Marty 23:53, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
Speaking of Chinese expressing new words, one of the crazy things I learned recently about Chinese is that their periodic table doesn't need abbreviations; whenever a new element is discovered, they make up a new character for it! Who needs a big word like "praseodymium" when you could just say 鐠 ? --Marty 23:53, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
That is weird, I can't see 105-109 but I can see 110 and 111. What new fonts do I need installed on my computer? - User \scriptstyle(6\sum_{n=1}^{\infty}n^{-2})^{1/2} 00:00, 18 March 2009 (EDT)
The "stoopid get" also doesn't know the difference between a tsunami and a tidal wave - a tidal wave is caused by tides, a tsunami is caused by undersea earthquakes. Andy Schlalfy is a teacher? My arse!  Lily Ta, wack! 17:05, 18 March 2009 (EDT)
To be much more fair than Andy deserves, back when I was a kid, what we now call Tsunamis were generally referred to as "Tidal Waves". --Gulik 16:53, 19 March 2009 (EDT)

Suicide by TK?[edit]

What is SStaple thinking questioning what the banhammer is for? Doesn't he know TK or ED will smite him for daring to question his betters? --BoredCPer 23:52, 16 March 2009 (EDT)

Accountability, what is that? - User \scriptstyle(6\sum_{n=1}^{\infty}n^{-2})^{1/2} 00:03, 17 March 2009 (EDT)

[6] TK demonstrates that

  • He is your boss
  • He has never disagreed with his boss
  • He has never heard of teacher evaluations
  • He does not know what "insult" means

I wasn't around for the old TK madness, so I sometimes doubt the "TK is just out to destroy CP" theory, but this . . . This is Bugler-esque. Coarb 03:30, 17 March 2009 (EDT)

And he has not take responsibility for his actions, even not to his peers:

  • (Block log); 04:02 . . TK (Talk | contribs) blocked Whraglyn (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of 5 years (account creation disabled, e-mail blocked) (Troublemaker: Administrators decisions are final. Threats of contacting other Admins and/or harassment will not be tolerated. Bye.)</font>

--larronsicut fur in nocte 04:09, 17 March 2009 (EDT)

I guess 360 degree review isn't a phrase that has penetrated whatever S&M parlour TK works at. --JeevesMkII The gentleman's gentleman at the other site 04:30, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
Ok, firstly, thank you for an image that will haunt me to my grave. Secondy, it's basically just TK engraving his self-imposed MYOB rule in stone, much like his bitch colleague Geo.Plrd closing the abuse page. --PsyGremlinWhut? 04:34, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
seriously, man, I am asking you in all seriousness, how can he go any further off the edge? I can't wait to find out... Neveruse513 08:48, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
That has to be one of his more bizarre rants. --PsyGremlinWhut? 09:38, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
He's trying to match Bugler, but failing miserably as he writes so poorly. PubliusTalk 10:41, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
Man, Bugler had panache. He had style. TK's just playing the lounge. --Purple George!YossieSpring in Fialta 16:07, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
I know the lounge, I've played the lounge and TK, sir, is not good enough for the lounge. SirChuckBI have very poor judgement 17:27, 17 March 2009 (EDT)

<- Wait, you've played the lounge and didn't see him? Hint: he's not part of the official entertainment, he's the meth-fueled bouncer lurking in the shadows. He got a side gig at EPIDEMIC 09, by the way, watching over the 8 hour, eleven band all ages party. Although he got confused and stole their logo to illustrate a CP borken news item about AIDS. ħumanUser talk:Human 18:16, 17 March 2009 (EDT) (PS, what part of © Copyright 2009 Wyndham City Council doesn't he understand?) (PPS, I emailed the author with some links)

I got mail[edit]

"Thanks for bringing this to my attention. Much obliged.

As we have copyright to this artwork, I will contact the site's administrators and have the logo and any reference to it removed."

ħumanUser talk:Human 20:48, 17 March 2009 (EDT)

Someone from Wyndham posted at CP about their logo it's been removed. Refugeetalk page 05:27, 18 March 2009 (EDT)
....and once again TK burns the evidence. (Deletion log); 08:36 . . TK (Talk | contribs) deleted "Conservapedia:Desk/Copyright" (Author request: doesn't want her phone number left up.) here's a shot (phone number redacted) Wyndham.png FJF 13:50, 18 March 2009 (EDT)
Yes, that "someone" was the copyright owner I emailed. I wouldn't really call that "burning", really, since the c owner made the mistake of posting their phone number. We'd have done the same thing, I hope. ħumanUser talk:Human 16:45, 18 March 2009 (EDT)
hey my link isn't working anymore. :( "The database did not find the text of a page that it should have found, named "Conservapedia:Desk/Copyright" (Diff: , 641097). " At least someone got a picture. Refugeetalk page 18:52, 18 March 2009 (EDT)
But the question I'm wondering is... did TK remove the image/logogogogo? Or did he just delete the Copyright page and do the proverbial "washing hands gesture" and walk off? AndyToad.gifNorsemanCyser Melomel 08:58, 19 March 2009 (EDT)
PJR actually did the deed as far as I recall (probably further enamouring himself to TK et al). And of course, now nobody can complain officially about CP breaking copyright, thanks to TK. I wonder if he's trying to get Andy sued? --PsyGremlinWhut? 09:15, 19 March 2009 (EDT)

How Convenient: "An immoral person is of course incapable of making a legitimate argument."[edit]

This was already WIGOed but the edit summary was not. The odd thing is I agree with TK, more or less, in that I think argument is an ethical act and it is possible to argue un-ethically (dishonestly or purely rhetorical (If I can convince you of X then X must be true, no matter what)--thus illegitimately. The rub of course is that in CP-land all non Christians are immoral and all liberal are immoral, so any argument that you can define as liberal or not made from a christian context is by definition immoral and therefore illegitimate.(Other than that we aren't biased to facts here) Therefore when Andy says "no legitimate arguments have been raised against crazy topic X" he is literally correct in the context of his bizarro world. I think we're done here. Will you turn out the lights when you leave? Me!Sheesh!Mine! 09:55, 17 March 2009 (EDT)

TK is cracking. Basically every response to anyone questioning anything lately has been "you're a deceitful liberal/open your mind and learn conservative values/bye." BTW, it's pretty clear to me from his recent edits that he's reading RW as much as CP. Hi TK -- I can tell you're suffering. You should seriously consider taking a CP break and working on yourself. The tone of much of what you're doing is hateful and way too highly energized -- you deserve some peace.CPNuisance 10:39, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
He doesn't need a break--Hatefulness is TK's reason for being. The common speculation here on RW is that TK is trying to bring down CP from within, but I disagree. TK just likes being an asshole, and CP is a place where an asshole can thrive (provided they're the right kind of asshole). Birds of a feather, and all that.--WJThomas 11:12, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
Agreed. TK's not a parodist, nor is he scheming to bring down CP through complex infighting. He's just an asshole, plain and simple, that's all. DogP 11:42, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
I think TK is a parodist it is just that he has never officially broke cover here at RW. He is content to maintain his act over here as well. As for his motives, I certainly don't believe he is a sincere contributor to CP like Karajerk or PJR for instance. He is playing a different game. His motives may well be simple day-to-day trollish entertainment, but he has shown in the past an ability to plan and organize so he could in fact have some sort of master plan the details of which are hidden to us. And yes, he no doubt reads every word in the commonly used talk spaces of RW. Me!Sheesh!Mine! 12:21, 17 March 2009 (EDT)

@Sheesh: I'm not sure what you mean by "argument is an ethical act", but I don't think arguments themselves (the premises and conclusions) are subject to moral evaluations. This is of course different from "arguing" (the putting forth of arguments), which very well might be. At any rate, I think TK couldn't possibly be more wrong. I assume by "legitimate" he either means a sound argument or a valid argument. To determine if an argument is sound we ask if it is possible that the premises could be true and yet the conclusion be false. If it is possible, the argument is not sound. To determine if an argument is valid, we take a sound argument and ask "are the premises true?" If they are true the argument is valid. If a sound argument has true premises, the conclusion is always true. This is true regardless of any facts (including whether they are being deceitful) about the person putting forth the argument. Soundness and validity govern the arguments put forth by everyone from creationists to Hitler and is the ONLY criteria I know of to judge an argument. Bjones 13:27, 17 March 2009 (EDT)

Please don't @ me (this is where a smilely would go). I meant that putting forth an argument is an ethical act. Trying to convince someone a certain thing is true or compell them to some action through the use of rhetorical devices is an ethical act. Thus, as TK suggested (Hi TK!), to the extent that there can be fair arguments you can't mount a legitimate one from an unethical or amoral position. You can try (Hi Andy, et al!). You can sometimes make effective arguments from a unethical positions though use or threat of force (Hi all!), or by mounting and defending disengenious assumptions(Hi PJR!), but that's not quite the same thing. 19:57, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
TK is a sociopath and shit-stirrer par excellence. When he wipes an alleged RW account at CP he discharges some pre-come but at the same time he's getting off on the knowledge that he's stifiling CP by applying an overlarge range-block. Two birds with one stone.  Lily Ta, wack! 18:42, 18 March 2009 (EDT)

Andy's spelling mistakes page[edit]

I'm not sure if this has been WIGO'd yet or not, and I'm too lazy to check, but Andy has created a page devoted to spelling mistakes caused by lack of phonics.

Let me say that again.

Andrew Schlafly has created a page devoted to spelling mistakes.

Why bother adding a joke? MDB 10:33, 17 March 2009 (EDT)

Like fuckin' Sham-Wow, it sells itself! AndyToad.gifNorsemanCyser Melomel 10:41, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
No jokes needed indeed. We need a graph of Andy's insightful theories and articles in order of insanity. This is in the "Fuckin' Nuts" range. PubliusTalk 10:43, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
The man has completely lost any tenuous contact he may have had with reality. He's a class A fruitcake. Auld Nick 10:57, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
I love his third example, and how it could actually be read either way (pun sortof intended). Z3rotalk 11:01, 17 March 2009 (EDT)

It's not about spelling mistakes--it's about reading mistakes.--WJThomas 11:08, 17 March 2009 (EDT)

exactly WJT, he basically makes the point that "if public schools taught phonics, no one would ever ever ever make a mistake while reading something." The man has lapped himself SirChuckBI have very poor judgement 11:14, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
Does no one else get it? (oh, you aren't dyslexic, so maybe don't understand how much we rely on computers). these are not phonetic mistakes, they are mistakes Andy has made (likely) online or at work because his little spell checker didn't say "that's a mis-spelled word", but someone pointed out to him, probably after "publishing" or filing, that it was the wrong word. by saying it's "common" or blaming everyone else, he doesn't have to address his own short comings.--Sun mowse.pngEn attendant Godot"Such is life." 11:18, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
I read it as a page dedicated to making fun of others' mistakes. ("HA-HA!! That retard said immortality instead of immorality! Only a liberal who never learned phonics would do something so dumb!").--WJThomas 11:25, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
This is a new high in utter stupidosity from Dr.Schlafly. There is just no way a normally adjusted person could write such shit. Definitely, now, he is in need of help. DogP 11:39, 17 March 2009 (EDT)

So lack of phonics is why Schlafly keeps making such silly mistakes as mixing up "fusillade" and "fuselage"? He should certainly buy himself a big package of that phonics stuff then..... --Just passing by 12:24, 17 March 2009 (EDT)

I'm getting a particular glow from the example that shows Gore perhaps losing 10,000 votes in FL. Would that have been enough to swing the 'lection? I guess Andy likes it because it makes liberal voters look stoopid? PS, I found a typo in my $100 "millenium" atlas... ironically, "typography" was substituted for "topography". ħumanUser talk:Human 17:24, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
Damned liberal atlas. They probably don't even mention how English is the Pinnacle of language, and that Iraq is safer now after we liberated it from the guys who blew up the Twin Towers.--Sun mowse.pngEn attendant Godot"Such is life." 19:26, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
Well, on point one, they list places in foreign countries in the "local" spelling, with the english version smaller underneath, so, yeah. And point two didn't happen yet when this was published (ca. 2000). ħumanUser talk:Human 16:48, 18 March 2009 (EDT)
So was "millenium" also a typo for millennium?  Lily Ta, wack! 19:06, 18 March 2009 (EDT)

An Informal Apology[edit]

I would like to offer my sincere apology for my careless vandalism last Friday night. I feel I owe all of you an explanation: I had a little much to drink and I was upset that TK had sniffed out what I thought was a pretty good sock. I got a little paranoid, and from what I remember I made some wild accusations about whom I thought was a mole. What I did was idiotic and I'm quite relieved that no permanent damage was done. I respect the work that so many of you have put into this site, and I assure you that you will not have anymore trouble from me in the future. Sincerely, Jorge 10:44, 17 March 2009 (EDT)

Don't drink and do the intertubes. It may cause boobs you will later regret:-) Auld Nick 11:00, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
Whut? there's no moles here... a couple of weasels maybe... --PsyGremlinWhut? 12:47, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
We got some mowses that occasionally chew on the server... --Purple George!YossieSpring in Fialta 15:57, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
At one point we had a hamster, but I haven't seen it in ages... any idea where it's got to? --Marty 23:59, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
Sorry Marty, it got to big for the house so Trent gave it away to a family in the country, it has a nice big farm to run around on now. Those gunshot you heard? Oh that was just Human trying to scare off some birds. - User \scriptstyle(6\sum_{n=1}^{\infty}n^{-2})^{1/2} 00:03, 18 March 2009 (EDT)
Yup, that Aimless Blaster sure helped out. ĵ₳¥ášÇ♠ʘ Banhammer, Renamer, and Goat 00:06, 18 March 2009 (EDT)
We do have some awful usernames, don't we. - User \scriptstyle(6\sum_{n=1}^{\infty}n^{-2})^{1/2} 01:42, 18 March 2009 (EDT)

0 in mental problems by its contributors.[edit]

Would someone care to explain the new 'news' tidbit at the top of the CP frontpage

Conservapedia: 84 million in page views, and 0 in mental problems by its contributors.
Learn and teach the truth, and it will set you free. 
Your only regret will be that you waited so long before opening your mind to it.

Dr Schlafly personnaly gave a psychological assessment to all his contributors?

Oh, the irony is so delicious, I can taste it from here... "Open your mind to the truth that being a close-minded, intolerant, fundamentalist bigot is the only way to be free!" Fuck you, Andy Schlafly. The Foxhole Atheist 11:36, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
Does that lead sentence even make grammatical sense? "0 in..." Oh wait, it's Andy we're talking about. --PsyGremlinWhut? 12:36, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
Anyone who can seriously assert that  K e n  D o l l  has no mental health problems almost certainly has mental health problems of their own in the "divorced from reality" field. --JeevesMkII The gentleman's gentleman at the other site 12:38, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
I think Mr Schlafly is saying that contributors don't exhibit mental problems in their role as wiki contributors. Clearly he has no way of knowing about other unrelated problems.--ConservapediaRoolz 12:41, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
And  K e n  D o l l ? Does he edit in a perfectly sane fashion? Stupid educated Phantom! 13:10, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
And Ed Poor's "Dinner and a Movie" blogs, that come off drunken if that just can't be considered stable or normal.--Sun mowse.pngEn attendant Godot"Such is life." 13:12, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
Disregarding even ken and ed, what about Andy? If that man doesn't have some form of degenerative mental illness (even if it is only raging alcoholism), I would be deeply surprised. Kaalis 13:14, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
None of these people's contributions, however poorly written or haphazard, are evidence of real mental problems. Plenty of sane people have trouble writing in a coherent way. I expect that if Mr Schlafly thinks a contributor has mental problems, he blocks them, so from his point of view everyone who remains must be sane. And of course he doesn't think he himself has anything wrong!--ConservapediaRoolz 13:17, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
People with real mental problems can write quite coherently. Mental problems and writing skills have nothing to do with each other either way. But the fact that Andy *cannot* hear dissent, *cannot* accept any argument without simply blowing his top; the fact that he is *quite* delusional at times about what we would call "the real world" suggests that he has some serious personality disorders that could use some profession help. You need only listen to him say "you believe in school prayer, therefore I know what you will say about EVERYTHING" to understand that his world is not the world of reality and not just in "gest" or fun, but something doesn't fire right in his head. The level of conspiracy he sees in the government; the lack of cogitative dissonence... that's not normal.--Sun mowse.pngEn attendant Godot"Such is life." 13:25, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
I agree that Mr Schlafly has certain prejudices and preoccupations, but I don't think that constitutes mental illness - few people have the insight to see the world as it really is all the time. He can be a bit overbearing, but then again, it's his blog to do what he likes with. Judging people based on the view you get over the internet is bound to give distorted results, so I would exercise caution in doing so.--ConservapediaRoolz 13:30, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
Yeah, except you started this by saying that is the sole criteria that the Arsefly is using to judge people's mental state. Anyway, in  K e n  D o l l 's case, it isn't just his writing that suggests he has problems, although his homosexuality obsession tends to suggest he's in severe denial about something. Rather it is his pattern of other behaviour. His delusions of grandeur (he honestly seems to think his articles have some effect on evolution and atheism, for example) is a key part, his unwillingness to supply his real name or identity even to his fellow sysops (he has used at least two pseudonyms in private CP discussions thus far) as well as his insistence that his obvious socks elsewhere aren't in fact him at all. Face it, the guy has issues. --JeevesMkII The gentleman's gentleman at the other site 13:35, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
And, in my opinion, less about any mental illnesses their editors might have (we'll never know) then the fact that he boasts none of them have any problems. As has been said, there's no reliable way to diagnos this over the internet. Z3rotalk 13:37, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
a) How do we know the contents of private CP discussions and b) How do we know that his real name is Kenneth DeMyer, and not another pseudonym? Stupid educated Phantom! 13:54, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
As you may remember, the ever helpful TK allowed us to see the SDG archives last time he blew his top. We know from emails forwarded to that group that he used to style himself "David Jensen", and also that CP came to the conclusion from IP addresses that he was in fact Ken DeMyer. There's also sound, if rather stalky, reasons that I won't go in to to believe that Ken is in fact his real name and not just another psuedonym. --JeevesMkII The gentleman's gentleman at the other site 14:09, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
He still does communicate as David Jensen, but also signs emails as Ken. PubliusTalk 18:09, 17 March 2009 (EDT)

Pretty much every fundie suffers from a form of grandiose delusional disorder. Remember, these people have a personal relationship with the creator of the universe, who gives them pearls of wisdom about the sinful nature of buttsecks. Neveruse513 14:03, 17 March 2009 (EDT)

I think I figured it out! Ignoring the illiteracy, of course. Remember, AS thinks that liberalism causes mental illness, and being conservative basically insures one against it. Ipso facto, dipso mania, since CP is solidly conservative, none of its contributors suffer from "mental problems". I still want to know what on earth prompted him to babble about it like that in his periodic pageview bragging on the news ticker. ħumanUser talk:Human 17:42, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
I think he's running down these days. With TK running every voice of dissent out of town, he doesn't have anyone to play with. He wants to get out his Captain Andy hat and torpedo the liberals, but by now, everybody knows to stay clear of the main page and don't feed the Andy troll, hence, he's coming up with more and more obvious incitments to argue. SirChuckBI have very poor judgement 17:55, 17 March 2009 (EDT)

In reply to User:WaitingforGodot Are mental illness and writing ability really not inversely correlated at all? I for one, often find it difficult to distinguish logically sound yet incoherent writing from insane ramblings. At some point, if some writing is bad enough, it seems impossible to figure out what the author was trying to say. Coarb 18:58, 17 March 2009 (EDT)

Still don't think it's right to jump to conclusions about mental health from what people post on the internet. As for why Mr Schlafly posted that in the first place... it probably wasn't that thoroughly thought out, and I would think there was an element of hyperbole underlining his triumphal feeling at getting so many page views.--ConservapediaRoolz 19:25, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
grins, you need more goat. No one is ready to prescribe anti-psychotics, or put him in a white coat. --Sun mowse.pngEn attendant Godot"Such is life." 19:50, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
The diagnosis of mental illness is really a question of degree. Most people are not truly rational even though they may act in a rational way in regard to their circumstances. And someone who is completely rational in everything they do probably has some sort of mental illness as irrationality is a fundamental part of humn nature. So while Andy and the other "nutty" sysops may not be certifiable they are certainly eccentric and en route to a psychological condition.  Lily Ta, wack! 19:19, 18 March 2009 (EDT)

Andy's Obama Hatred[edit]

Ok, I get the fact that Andy hates and resents Obama because one became the POTUS and the other became.... Well Andy, but this post is off the charts when measured in bizarre factor. First off, does Andy really think that Barack Obama is personally writing, coding, and uploading the White House web page? Two, does he know that the Administration is correct in this? Once Obama officially names someone, they are considered an appointment, but they cannot begin serving until confirmed by Congress, and three, did he miss that large column that reads "Senate Confirmation Date?" Andy, we're all worried about you.... SirChuckBI have very poor judgement 13:32, 17 March 2009 (EDT)

Stop pointing out factual errors in perfectly reasoned arguments, liberal deceiver! Z3rotalk 13:36, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
The terms are used interchangeably in this context in Article II of the Consty. So everyone can be right. I wonder if past administrations are as stupid as Andy thinks Obama's is for using "appoint" in a way that displeases the Assfly.CPNuisance 14:34, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
Jesus, doesn't Andy know how to use Google? Even Fox News calls them "appointments" before they've been confirmed. [7] Bjones 13:43, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
Zero, I am a Penguin Knight, we don't deceive! SirChuckBI have very poor judgement 13:47, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
Well, isn't this a case for Hsmom - as DinsdaleP is history? larronsicut fur in nocte 13:49, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
"SirChuckB" (obviously not your real name), your rant above is silly. I looked at your contributions and you say you don't believe Jesus is God, so I'm confident you're wrong. Furthermore, you deny that gun ownership reduces moral decay. As I've said before, Conservapedia concerns more than politics. We have over 20,000 entries here. Insistence on last wordism in violation of our rules, without contributing substance to this encyclopedia, could result in account blocking. In Christ.--Aschlafly 17:57, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
"Aschlafly," your lack of comprehension is indicative of your political ideology. Its clear that you are a liberal who has nothing better to do than troll us. Tell me, what are your positions on Gun Control and School Prayer? I am 99% certain that you also believe in the theory of evolution and gravity. EternalCritic 14:05, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
We desperately need a {{tkquote}}{{tkdismissal}}. Neveruse513 14:09, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
TK doesn't reuse things as often and his style isn't nearly as distinct. Probably wouldn't be too hard to make a {{Jinxquote}} though. A TK one would probably require checkuser powers to abuse and be a creepy stalker. EternalCritic 14:14, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
EternalCritic, you would probably get a lot more done on this Wiki if you stopped moving around the West Midland area of the United Kingdom. Please familiarize yourself with the Commandments or otherwise be elsewhere. On second thought, after reviewing your edits it seems that the best course of action would be to wish you a sincere Godspeed. (BTW, all tkdismissals must end with teh banhammer and an e-mail block) Neveruse513 14:18, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
Gentlemen! I will reward your precious Playstation 2, enabling me to destroy atheism on the internet. You should all be feasting over Operation ferret fancier, which will likely give Conservapedia a top result on a certain search engine starting with G.

Ladies and Gentlemen at a rather liberal website,

I find the irony delicious, your comments in regards to the death of homosexual practices on the internet are increasingly unsurprising. In regards to the subject of lesbianism and web traffic, I would also point out that Gentlemen who idolize Richard Dawkins, there is a video I think you need to see. It shows Richard Dawkins latest debate, and I think you will agree that he does not do very well, and that he most certainly lacks machismo!In fact, by tomorrow, it is likely Homosexuality will have lost all vestiges of credibility. :) :) :)

Rest assured, Operation Spit is gathering steam!!! Time to shatter atheism's glass jaw!



Your grammar isn't quite bad enought o be Ken's. EternalCritic 15:17, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
Ahhh....the blessed Kenquote! EddyP 15:32, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
Gentlemen! I will reward your precious Playstation 2, enabling me to destroy atheism on the internet. You should all be feasting over Operation ferret fancier, which will likely give Conservapedia a top result on a certain search engine starting with G.

Ladies and Gentlemen at a rather liberal website,

I find the irony delicious, your comments in regards to the death of homosexual practices on the internet are increasingly unsurprising. In regards to the subject of lesbianism and web traffic, I would also point out that Gentlemen who idolize Richard Dawkins, there is a video I think you need to see. It shows Richard Dawkins latest debate, and I think you will agree that he does not do very well, and that he most certainly lacks machismo!In fact, by tomorrow, it is likely Homosexuality will have lost all vestiges of credibility. :) :) :)

Rest assured, Operation Spit is gathering steam!!! Time to shatter atheism's glass jaw!



Evolution is dodging the train that is creationism! Ole ole ole!

OH GOD IT HURTS MY BRAIN EternalCritic 17:14, 17 March 2009 (EDT)

After your mention of a forbidden vandal site in Talk:Conervapedia Commandments, Andy has determined you are a troll. Like all atheists, it is apparent that you are a sock of Trent. After much debate, it was decided that you have been memory holed, biotch. You need to remember that this is the Christian encyclopedia, and overly critical comments, such as yours about Conservative are pointless and futile and will be reverted. In conclusion, if you think you were blocked unfairly, and would like to discuss this, please send Andy an email. Karajou 18:59, 25 May 2019 (UTC)


Great god, Ken. The least you could do is have Darwin be one third, Hitler be one third, and Stalin be one third. --<choose> <option>Input The ResistorOutput</option> <option>CoyoteOver 450 pages watched NOT including talk pages</option> <option>The Trickster</option>

<option>Acionyx</option> 17:26, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
Maybe he's leaving room for another face later on, Hmm, Mao Zedong was a commie and an atheist like Stalin, and we could add a KKK hood in there, and a fraction of Manson's head, and the eyes of Satan, and a werewolf. Just keep on showing Darwin sharing a face with scary people. Deadly wheels Painkiller 20:21, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
Who wants to make it for him? And then send it by e-mail? --<choose>

<option>Input The ResistorOutput</option> <option>CoyoteOver 450 pages watched NOT including talk pages</option> <option>The Trickster</option> <option>Acionyx</option> 20:52, 17 March 2009 (EDT)

An animated gif would be far more effective - 1 sec darwin, 1/2 sec hitler, 1 sec darwin, 1/2 sec pol pot (etc.) And blur the transitions for better effect. ħumanUser talk:Human 16:55, 18 March 2009 (EDT)


Sorry TK, I was wrong, no offence. Here. TK: Troublemaker! Block! Broccoli 17:40, 17 March 2009 (EDT)

And the lesson is.... TK is a dick, but we knew that.... Hey Tk, cause I know you read this... Can you tell exactly what Bush's Not Congress initiative was? I can't seem to find information about it anywhere. SirChuckBI have very poor judgement 17:45, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
TK's behaviour seems to have become more extreme of late. I think something in real life must have set him off. My guesses are: He has been stalking his ex-wife in the deluded hope of a reconciliation and she has taken out a restraining order on him; one of his kids blanked him in the street; he can't get a particularly troublesome egg stain off his favourite brown tie; an attractive young lady got up and moved to a different seat when he sat next to her on a bus; the local Walmart has run out of its cheapest variety of instant coffee. Pure speculation, but I'm 96% certain it's one of those.Matt 17:53, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
Thank you. Neveruse513 08:59, 18 March 2009 (EDT)
How did you know TK has an ex-wife?  Lily Ta, wack! 19:33, 18 March 2009 (EDT)

I refuse to go to a heathen dentist![edit]

Foxtrot doesn't know any Jews— Unsigned, by: Coarb / talk / contribs

Foxtrot somehow also knows the sexual orientation and religion of the firefighters in his town. I'm not exactly sure how he knows. Coarb 17:56, 17 March 2009 (EDT)

Two things on this, A... I love he talks about it like it's some external trait he could detect in an insant, and B. I almost feel sorry for Andy, seeing obvious parodists ravage his site like that... It's like watching Road Runner cartoons: you know what's going to happen, but you feel sorry for Wile E. just a little bit. SirChuckBI have very poor judgement 17:51, 17 March 2009 (EDT)

I just hope he never needs a lawyer, doctor, or dentist. Or wants to join our Discordian Anarchosyndicalist Jewish conspiracy to get his hands on some of that Hollywood and banking industry money! CPNuisance 18:05, 17 March 2009 (EDT)

Your standard model evangelical comes with all-points gaydar at no extra cost. After all, if you're throwing a dinner party you don't want it rudely interrupted by sodomites demanding you bring out your guests that they might know them. --JeevesMkII The gentleman's gentleman at the other site 18:14, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
If that happens, just offer them your wife and virgin daughter instead.... I mean, if they wanna know the man, I'm sure they'll take some hot women instead. And remember, it's in the bible, so it's all right. SirChuckBI have very poor judgement 18:34, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
Then later, you hot daughters will get you drunk and sleep with you. That's Andy's favourite bit of the Bible. --JeevesMkII The gentleman's gentleman at the other site 18:45, 17 March 2009 (EDT)


The favorites reek Ken all over this shit heap, but Christ Andy's voice is scary. Also, seems rather suspicious that comments were disabled on the page. ENorman 18:08, 17 March 2009 (EDT)

To paraphrase Monty Python: Ken may be an idiot, but he's no fool. SirChuckBI have very poor judgement 18:39, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
MOAR HITLER favorites - its nice that Conservapedia likes HITLER isnt it .. 18:13, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
The first thing I thought when I read about this on WIGO was that Ken must be behind it. I'm not the least bit surprised. Also, I like how he took The Hour's piece on them and phrased it as if they made it. --Purple George!YossieSpring in Fialta 19:11, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
It looks like the Hitler video that is favorited is the one that was whored out to  K e n  D o l l 's evolution article. Deadly wheels Painkiller 20:34, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
Having watched The Hour video, I've finally come to terms with how Conservapedia was created. You know how sometimes in class some kid would throw up a superficially-good-but-actually-rubbish idea? Like "if we don't have enough money for public services, why don't we just print it?" or "why don't you use the electricity supplied by the power plant to fuel the power plant?" - and then the teacher sort of nods along saying it's a really interesting idea and maybe they should send a letter to a representative just so as not to hurt the kids feelings and to make them feel creative and clever? Well one day in Schlafly's class some innocent said what equated to "why don't a bunch of kids and a failed lawyer try and create a more accurate knowledge resource than wikipedia?", and history was made.Bil08 22:07, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
"failed lawyer" ? The great and awesome Ashlafly was originally a superb engineer but made those intel guys feel inadequate so he decided to become a lawyer and leave the little people to do the engineering bit. Having graduated from a prestigious law school he is now counsel to a vast and respected medical association and doing a spectacular job. No one is prepared to face his mighty wrath in open court , which is why he hasn't appeared there.  :) This has been a "True History of the World Factbook presentation" 23:26, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
Yeah, the AAPS really blew the lid off of Obama's mind control techniques. And the think he almost got elected! Oh wait... CorryI'll be in the hospital bar. 00:38, 18 March 2009 (EDT)
Wait... Was THIS the "Ides of March" deal? Please tell me "No." Such a fucking waste... The Foxhole Atheist 01:04, 18 March 2009 (EDT)
Actually good point it was three days ago. Well another complete fizzer by  K e n  D o l l , so all those months of build up for what? 3 links from YouTube, not impressed. - User \scriptstyle(6\sum_{n=1}^{\infty}n^{-2})^{1/2} 01:07, 18 March 2009 (EDT)
I wonder when  K e n  D o l l  will inevitably return to Youtube to find Andyquote liberally plastered all over the comments section. Deadly wheels Painkiller 06:36, 18 March 2009 (EDT)

Okay, this is totally not a Ken production. Moar Hitler in faves, and, for some obscure reason that even the Google engineers can't explain, "Gay Education" somehow appears in the related videos - undoubtedly, Google's Giant Robot Brain has deemed that this video has to be extremely relevant to the discussion at hand. (I know, it's thanks to the "education" tag in the video, but still.) Joking aside, I think this entrée to the fashionable field of video is just a good example of how not to do things. What makes YouTube a great website? How do people get drawn to the successful channels? Two things: Original content and free commenting/replying/embedding. So far, there's no original content on this channel (just crappier quality repost of a video that has been in YouTube for 10 months through the official channel of the show) and the channel comments are disabled, and no doubt they'd love to kill the rest of the comments too. And I seriously think that loudly and proudly launching the channel with damn near no content at all is a massively horrible move. --wwwwolf (barks/growls) 14:21, 18 March 2009 (EDT)

I'm predicting a venomfangx-style censorship effort. Upload your video, sock up and give yourself a single five-star vote. Disable ratings. Turn on comment approval. Approve only positive comments... ???? Profit!!! Neveruse513 14:24, 18 March 2009 (EDT)
ROFL! You noticed the "gay education" cartoon, too? It's pretty informative, if you watch it. Does some decent Fundy-busting. Given Kenny's propensity for having a whole sock TRUNK, I am willing to bet that the user Since33AD is him as well. The entire 30 seconds of the "favorited" video is simply Conservative's standard forum sock plea of "Have you guys checked out... blah, blah, blah...". I called him on his shit, too. I am fully expecting to find my account suspended when I get home from work today, as I used some wonderfully colored language in doing so. I need to learn to relax. I need to learn to relax. I need to learn to relax. The Foxhole Atheist 14:38, 18 March 2009 (EDT)
From the faves: Supernatural...POWERS!. --Purple George!YossieSpring in Fialta 22:57, 18 March 2009 (EDT)
I counted the use of "SUPERNATURAL POWER" 9 times in the first 2:30. Of course then its a 6 min plug for conservapedia. I wonder if he can't tell the difference between fiction and non-fiction.--ScottA 00:31, 19 March 2009 (EDT)
NephilimFree? The same NephilimFree that has been a source of rather good quotes over at FSTDT? ...we're witnessing epic things unfold here. --wwwwolf (barks/growls) 03:37, 19 March 2009 (EDT)

Speaking of mental health...[edit]

Not only does Ken, in his latest piece of "gentlemen" drivel thinks that no-one can see through his online persona's (despite his trademark writing style) but he also thinks that no one is able to refute his evolution article (see here ken). ANNNND on top of this, Andy's recent behaviour seems to suggest that he believes Conservapedia can cure mental illness. These actions in themselves are products of deeply flawed minds. Ace McWickedRevolt 18:43, 17 March 2009 (EDT)

Ken is... Ken. The man's gone on about how we can't possibly prove his socking because he won't admit it since his earliest Newton days here. And Andy has made the whole "conservatism -> mental health" link a good while ago, so the "Conservapedia -> mental health" one shouldn't come as a surprise. --Sid 18:49, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
Wow... how many revisions did it take him to write that novel? The EmperorKneel before Zod! 18:56, 17 March 2009 (EDT) MOAR Only 11. i would have expected upper 20's.
Well lets just check one statement.... By my count, Ken edited the Homosexuality article about 14 times in Feb of 09... Or course, that may have been two sentences with Ken. Furthermore, of the current 50 edits in the log, going back to early Nov 08, 49 of them are Ken and 1 is DeanS. That gives me a total of 98% Ken.... don't challenge us on things we can check. by the way Ken, do you know why your rarely edit the article? BECAUSE YOU LOCKED IT DOWN AND KEEP HOLD OF IT LIKE A 3 YEAR OLD. That's why you idiot. SirChuckBI have very poor judgement 19:02, 17 March 2009 (EDT)PS After posting this, I went out to 100 edits and Ken was 99 of them. I had to go out to 250 before I found a name other than Ken or the one DeanS. I know see that Gentleman Emperor has taken it all the way and found 6 that were not you... 98.8%, you've really moved on.

(EC, dammit)Gentleman Conservative,

In regards to your claim that you have "moved on" aafter creating your homosexuality article, might I refer you to here?. In case you are lazy, of the 500 edits displayes, 6 were not by you.


Gentelman The EmperorKneel before Zod! 19:03, 17 March 2009 (EDT)

P.S.  :):):):):):):)

In order:
  • We like homosexuals around here, we don't pretend they are bad and then write endlessly on how bad they are.
  • Bible, whatever take it or leave it, it is a personal choice.
  • Your evolution article is crap and only an idiot would be persuaded by it. I started a rebuttal Conservapedia:Evolution and got bored, the whole article is quotes that can easily shown to have been taken out of context. Epic Phail.
  • We can tell by your witting style and also the fact that the first contribution a new user makes to a forum is something stupid like "have you seen this article on Conservapeida, articles on this website soon obtain a high Google ranking" (I shit you not he basically wrote that at
  • Strange that despite people believing it has never been shown in a double blind experiment.
 K e n  D o l l  you are a lying idiot. - User \scriptstyle(6\sum_{n=1}^{\infty}n^{-2})^{1/2} 19:05, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
FWIW, I've been thinking about homosexuality a lot lately, because two of my best friends started dating and it's totally cute. But I don't think that's really what Ken's on about. That, and the usual yaoi/slash speculations about various fictional characters, but you gotta let us have our fun, y'all! --Kels 22:59, 17 March 2009 (EDT)

Okay, went back 1000 and 9 edits were un-ken. He has 7 straight 100-limit pages that are EXCLUSIVELY him. The EmperorKneel before Zod! 19:25, 17 March 2009 (EDT)

One one forum, a Totally Not Ken guy went from "Hey, have you seen this article about evolution/atheism/homosexuality on CP? I think the author makes a few interesting points!" to "I have added new material, what do you think?" within the same thread. And yeah, the style is always the same. Always the same. Always, some user signs up, only to immediately plug the evolution article, followed by him claiming that nobody on the entire planet will ever refute a single statement in it and that all these things are simply "candid quotes" that "atheists/evolutionists try to discredit just because they find them uncomfortable". Yawny yawn. --Sid 20:42, 17 March 2009 (EDT)

Hey guys, I found this really cool hard-hitting article on Evolution and you might want to check it out. It features accurate scientific data, and hard-hitting quotes by evolutionists, and is not afraid to explore the Darwin-Hitler connection. While you're there, you might want to check out the new article on Atheism as well. It should have you quaking in your liberal boots.

So long! I'm off to add new material.

CDesignpropensitist 22:15, 17 March 2009 (EDT)

You pretty much got it. - User \scriptstyle(6\sum_{n=1}^{\infty}n^{-2})^{1/2} 22:47, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
Let me look at your new drivel shall we:
  • I wasn't expecting to find Conservapedian Daniel121 anywhere but at Conservapedia, try a few less redundancies when you write. Again we like homosexuals, some of our members are homosexuals, we don't care. Yes we have done a page bump to Homosexual Obsession, we also did one to one of those 4 you are keeping track of so you are wasting your time with that stat list because we are manipulating it.
  • Why amend the homosexuality article to include prop 8 when you have an article on it? Beside prop 8 was politics not sexuality it probably doesn't belong in the article anyway. What is the point of your statement come to that?
  • Every article should have some content from other users it is a fucking wiki if you wanted to do monologues get your own website or blog. Again what is your point here?
  • Finally again we don't care if only one other person on the internet likes our article. Besides what is the top result for a search on evolution? Wikipedia. We pretty much support its content anyway so why bother redoing it?
Yet again  K e n  D o l l , Epic Phail. - User \scriptstyle(6\sum_{n=1}^{\infty}n^{-2})^{1/2} 22:58, 17 March 2009 (EDT)

Dearest Ken, You still have not figured out how to do multiple citations to the same reference. It's been over two years! Come on! Your Mayo Clinic Links are broken, your sources incredibly biased, and nary a citation to a peer-reviewed source. Your article lacks any scholarly value, and you can't even make your own argument, you just quote mine. Sterilewalkie-talkie 23:10, 17 March 2009 (EDT)

Anyone else laugh when they read this
By the way, I know it must be infuriating to you that most members of your website as a whole likely think about the subject of homosexuality far more than I do, but I suggest you swallow your collective pride and just admit this matter.
Ken, don't use the phrase sollow your pride when you're pretending you don't have repressed homosexual tendencies. It's called a Freudian slip, look it up. By the way Ken, you know what's really funny? You whore out your articles like a third world prostitute with a clean bill of health and you have nothing, we have a few links to our articles because people actually want to read them.... I know Andy doesn't understand this, but I will try to convince you... People are laughing at you. SirChuckBI have very poor judgement 23:21, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
Who is obsessed here?

Kenny Baby - it's really funny the way you repeat yourself when you write your drivel to us in regards to stuff you did, when you repeat yourself when writing to us in regards to stuff you did. I refer you to your second paragraph in your PPS. Learn to write, you mad old badger, or the world will continue to ignore you, as they are now. Well....even if you could write, they'd ignore you. DogP 16:25, 18 March 2009 (EDT)

Founder, TK, Bureaucrat, Senior Administrator, Admin, Junior Admin, Editor, Contributor, PEASANT.[edit]

Andy expands the user levels yet again. I wonder if that means that people who aren't "real contributors" are actually bound to the Contributor's Guidelines... ;) --Sid 20:32, 17 March 2009 (EDT)

Conservatives like to know their exact place in a nice comfy rigid heirarchy... ħumanUser talk:Human 20:47, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
Could we get a calculation of who, over the last four months, has contributed once or more per day on overage? Coarb 21:08, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
"talk talk talk" gets you banned. less you're a sysop.--Sun mowse.pngEn attendant Godot"Such is life." 22:13, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
I wanted to try to sock up, but unless I am a complete dolt, they've obfuscated and/or removed the "Create Account" option from their log in/create account page. How do you even get a foot in the door, now? Oh well... TK's body count finally has a cap in place, I guess. The Foxhole Atheist 02:03, 18 March 2009 (EDT)
CP has gone into night mode. It has been along time since I have edited there, but editing use to go on at 10:30pm where I live, which is still 6 hours away. - User \scriptstyle(6\sum_{n=1}^{\infty}n^{-2})^{1/2} 02:09, 18 March 2009 (EDT)

Schlafloff off RW?[edit]

A Schlafloff has begun on Conservapedia's channel's only video.

There are some familiar names here. - User \scriptstyle(6\sum_{n=1}^{\infty}n^{-2})^{1/2} 23:15, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
Who doesn't love a good Schlafloff? ENorman 23:22, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
EnDSchultz1 is certainly not from the sockdrawer] EternalCritic 23:26, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
Oh come on Javascap, at least put in a link when you do that. Also stick on in for the quote generator, Poe's law and Ken DeMyer, I want them to sore up the rank of a search engine starting with G. - User \scriptstyle(6\sum_{n=1}^{\infty}n^{-2})^{1/2} 23:30, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
I don't think youtube does links, and if it does, I am very sure it would be hard to do. ĵ₳¥ášÇ♠ʘ Banhammer, Renamer, and Goat 23:32, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
A lot of forums recognise anything that starts with http:// as a link, give it ago. Especially - User \scriptstyle(6\sum_{n=1}^{\infty}n^{-2})^{1/2} 23:36, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
I am just looking forward to seeing the response to the RW bomb being dropped (ole ole ole) ĵ₳¥ášÇ♠ʘ Banhammer, Renamer, and Goat 23:40, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
It will be a no comment channel in less than an hour. Yeah we have ruined something again! - User \scriptstyle(6\sum_{n=1}^{\infty}n^{-2})^{1/2} 23:41, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
"Anonymous User" (recreate your account with your real first name and last initial), we know how atheists love to censor everything from classroom prayer to criticism of evolution. I wasted time with your unsubstantial additions and based on your postings, I bet you don't spend even 5% of your spare time reading or analyzing the Bible, so regardless, I'm so confident that you're a spokesperson for the homosexual agenda. Your atheistic worldview has led you to deny that chivalry was and is an ideal for all to strive for. It is very effective in reducing and eliminating friction, insults, hard-feelings, and accidents, not to mention that it deters Hollywood values. Observation and logic dictate that I've taught 145 teenagers for 6 years now, and can tell you it makes an enormous difference to be able to begin class with a prayer. Atheists are less charitable than Christians. There's no denying it. --aschlafly 18:59, 25 May 2019 (UTC)
I never grow tired of that thing. And to π, YES! We decietful liburals have united for a common cause to subvert teh true American Values!11!!! ĵ₳¥ášÇ♠ʘ Banhammer, Renamer, and Goat 23:44, 17 March 2009 (EDT)
Anonymous070777 is my sock over there on teh yootoobes. How long until they disable comments? Any takers? The Foxhole Atheist 02:05, 18 March 2009 (EDT)
Wot?!? What have I done now? It wasn't me, honest guv!Mick McT 04:32, 18 March 2009 (EDT)
Ah Andy. I can tell with a 95% certainty that those gerbils must be chafing rather than giving pleasure, what with you riding that insanity chicken at the same time. That is as obvious and undeniable as η(au + v, w) = aη(u, w) + η(v, w) where v is the \sqrt -i+ the weight of a gerbil on Pluto. But please, by all means continue with your assertion that gun control causes abortion and that non-abstinence based sex education leads directly to genocide and an unreasonable belief in Darwinistic evolution.--stunteddwarf 10:14, 18 March 2009 (EDT)

A little  K e n  D o l l -like[edit]

This is a non-sequitur which you are all free to ignore, but less than 4 days after the deletion we have had 9,369 view of WIGOCP. This page gets huge traffic. That is all really, sorry for pointing out the obvious I was just a little over come when I noticed. - User \scriptstyle(6\sum_{n=1}^{\infty}n^{-2})^{1/2} 01:36, 18 March 2009 (EDT)

Gentleman Pi, it is obvious what is happening here. Conservatives are flocking to WIGO in order to get the wisdom. Ace McWickedRevolt 02:33, 18 March 2009 (EDT)
Wait, this page got deleted? What did I miss? I understand someone (don't know who) somehow borked the page... could someone bring me up to speed? ĵ₳¥ášÇ♠ʘ Banhammer, Renamer, and Goat 09:23, 18 March 2009 (EDT)
Basic story, assuming all statments are true is as follows: User:Jorge got blitzed and was having some fun, and decided to delete WIGOCP thinking it would just be restored. After it was done, he discovered the difficulty. WIGO stayed blank with just some strange crap Jorge had written until another user, I wanna say Nx figured out how to disable the time out feature and restore it. That is all. SirChuckBI have very poor judgement 12:27, 18 March 2009 (EDT)


May I present... Dransdarwitalimao!

Nice. Who is number two? - User \scriptstyle(6\sum_{n=1}^{\infty}n^{-2})^{1/2} 02:21, 18 March 2009 (EDT)
Reading from left to right: Dracula*, Charles Manson, Charles Darwin, Adolf Hitler, Josef Stalin, Mao Zedong. (*It's actually not Dracula; it's Bram Stoker's vampire character from Mark of the Vampire, as you can tell by the bullet wound on his temple, but whatever.) I wanted to get Hannibal Lecter too, but I couldn't find a good recognizable pic. --Marty 02:31, 18 March 2009 (EDT)
Mason? Hmmm you reckon? Perhaps. Ace McWickedRevolt 02:35, 18 March 2009 (EDT)
Not Mason, Manson! [8] --Marty 02:41, 18 March 2009 (EDT)
What we really need to do is build one of those photo collages where the overall picture is made of lots of little photos, as with the Bush/Iraq War casualties one. I'm fairly sure there are bits of open source software that do that. The only problem is, actual creationists would probably steal it and use it for purposes other than taking the piss out of  K e n  D o l l . --JeevesMkII The gentleman's gentleman at the other site 02:43, 18 March 2009 (EDT)
(Edit: Photomosaic.) Yeah, I see no reason for us to make an awesome photomosaic dissing Darwin. Let's make an awesome photomosaic dissing Andy. Or poison dart frogs. Or whatever, really. Photomosaics are awesome. --Marty 02:50, 18 March 2009 (EDT) I mean "let's make an awesome photomosaic where the picture is a poison dart frog," not "let's poison dart frogs", but I guess whatever floats your boat

Other faces yet to incorporate: Lecter. Pinhead. Pennywise the Clown. The Surgeon's Photo. Nosferatu (which  K e n  D o l l  has already mashed up with Barack Obama). Liberace. --Marty 03:02, 18 March 2009 (EDT)

And for the equilirium scientists/monsters, Dawkins and Lenski. Barraki 05:11, 18 March 2009 (EDT)
I can't believe I forgot Saddam Hussein and Osama bin Laden. Also Carl Sagan. :) --Marty 13:10, 18 March 2009 (EDT)
I think Einstein should be included as per this. Neveruse513 13:16, 18 March 2009 (EDT)

For a very limited time only: [9] For the source, Google "Metapixel". I'm going to sleep now. --Marty 04:25, 18 March 2009 (EDT)

Superawesome photomosaic app at AndreaMosaic (windows, mac and linux versions) Fox 05:49, 18 March 2009 (EDT)
AndreaMosaic pic: very basic, only had a couple of pics of Che, Stalin, Lenin, Marx, Tito and Mao to use.


One edit a day keeps madness away ... Well, according to Aschlafly, one edit is not sufficient:

CSGuy, your substantive contributions have averaged less than one-a-day over the past four months. In fact, I just had a hard time finding a single significant contribution by you.

So, to get your resistance up by Conservapedia, at least one substantive contribution a day over the past four month is necessary. Who fulfills this conscription? I'll be generous and allow every contribution to the main space to be counted as substantive. Taking the data from March 13th, 2009, there were 14,149 editors contributors lads who have made at least one edit at CP. But only 2090 did so during the last four month - of which 73 edited at least once a day, though only a meager 53 made a sufficient number of edits to the main-space. Congrats, Aschlafly! But perhaps you should change the headline:

84 million in page views, and 0 in mental problems by its contributors.

to something like

84 million in page views, and perhaps 53 sane contributors.

But as cp:User:Conservative is in this number, the salutary effect of CP remains doubtful. larronsicut fur in nocte 05:08, 18 March 2009 (EDT)

How many of those 53 were blocked later? - User \scriptstyle(6\sum_{n=1}^{\infty}n^{-2})^{1/2} 06:23, 18 March 2009 (EDT)
Here you go: AddisonDM ( sysop, Siteadmin ), AlanE, AlexanderM, Aschlafly ( sysop, bureaucrat, checkuser, Siteadmin ), BertSchlossberg ( Upload, edit, Block ), BrianCo, BRichtigen, Bugler, Canuck, Chippeterson ( Upload, Block ), CMcFreeze, Conservapedia1, Conservative ( sysop, checkuser ), CPalmer, CSGuy, Daniel1212, DeanS ( sysop, checkuser, Siteadmin ), DeniseM ( Upload, edit, Block ), DevenG, DuncanB ( sysop, Siteadmin ), Dwain, Ed Poor ( sysop, checkuser, Siteadmin ), Foxtrot ( Upload, edit, Block ), Frey, Geo.plrd ( sysop, checkuser, Siteadmin ), GregL, HelpJazz, Hsmom ( edit ), Iduan, Ieuan, JessicaT ( sysop, Siteadmin ), Joaquín Martínez ( sysop ), Jpatt ( sysop, Siteadmin ), JY23 ( Block ), Karajou ( sysop, checkuser, Siteadmin ), Krysg, Learn together ( sysop, checkuser, Upload, edit, Block, Siteadmin ), Markr, MikeSalter, Philip J. Rayment ( sysop, checkuser, Siteadmin ), Redirect fixer, RickD ( edit ), RJJensen ( sysop, Siteadmin ), RodWeathers, SamY, Sulli, Taj ( Upload, edit, Block ), TerryH ( sysop, checkuser, Siteadmin ), TK ( sysop, checkuser, Siteadmin ), Tolkiendil, WesleyS ( Block ), WilliamBeason.
Interestingly, CSGuy made the cut. But that's just because I have to stick to facts, not to higher insights... larronsicut fur in nocte 08:25, 18 March 2009 (EDT)
I had a few socks get blocked that had made maybe half a dozen substantive edits before they opened their mouths on talk pages and outed themselves and liberals masquerading through deceit as christian conservatives. They're not on the list, I suspect because their edits got eaten. With one of them not only did TK block him, but he reverted all of his edits, and then handcopied back all of the minor ones, including spelling and grammar edits and other minor corrections, so he could get credit for them.
I was two members of the goon squad, but neither shows up as such on that list. Credit where credit's due... :-( Fretfulporpentine 11:23, 18 March 2009 (EDT)
De Groin's Law of the Conservation of Wiki-Substance holds that an edit to a non-talk page does not lose its substantivenessness merely because it was reverted and then reinserted by another user. A Corollary is that a fact's truthiness exists only in its assertion.CPNuisance 09:57, 18 March 2009 (EDT)
You really seem to like the phrase "liberals masquerading through deceit as christian conservatives", CPN. --PsyGremlinWhut? 10:02, 18 March 2009 (EDT)
I love it. And I'm honored to have been accused of doing it. I'll do it again. Join me. CPNuisance 10:10, 18 March 2009 (EDT)
RodWeathers and BrianCo were blocked as well. There might be some others in there too.--ConservapediaRoolz 09:22, 18 March 2009 (EDT)
So ignoring the goon squad members, there's a total of 16 ordinary editors. Yup, just the kind of editing force you need to take on Wikipedia. --PsyGremlinWhut? 09:40, 18 March 2009 (EDT) do you define the goon squad? Neveruse513 09:41, 18 March 2009 (EDT)
Those with blocking powers and more. HSMom only has edit rights, so she falls into the non-goon category. --PsyGremlinWhut? 09:46, 18 March 2009 (EDT)

If I was CSGuy, I'd be pretty insulted by that. He's made over 2,500 edits to Conservapedia, and been there since 2007. Yet Schlafly smacks him down as an unsubstantive contributor. Dreaded Walrus 11:09, 18 March 2009 (EDT)

On Good Samaritans[edit]

Ignoring Andy's strange assertion that the term "Good Samaritan" was not available to the translators of the King James Bible, he also claims that the point of the Good Samaritan story was "genuine charity is the best approach."

Well, that's certainly part of the point, but there's another point to the story modern audiences miss.

The 1st Century Jewish target audience of the Parable loathed Samaritans, and the feeling was mutual. So, charity was not the sole point of the story; the point was also that someone who would have been expected to be least likely to help was the one who helped.

A modern version might go like this. An American Christian was mugged and beaten in the city. A Catholic priest saw him lying in the gutter, but said, "I have to go hear confession." A Baptist minister then saw him, but said, "I must go finish Sunday's sermon". Then, a Muslim imam saw, and helped him.

Sorry for the sermon, but I heard this take on the story once in church, and I found it absolutely fascinating.

(Yes, I'm a churchgoer, just the open-minded progressive type.)— Unsigned, by: MDB / talk / contribs

I think in Andy's case this would be akin to a parable entitled 'The Good Liberal' and that's just far too much of an oxymoron on his eyes. StarFish 08:28, 18 March 2009 (EDT)
Yeah, I've always thought people missed that key aspect of the story. As you said, far more about enemy being the one to help, than about "helping" in some kind of general sense. And why would andy say the KJV didn't have the term "good Samaritan". They had the term "good" "god" (at least as far back as Beowulf) and "Samaritan", a person from Samar. What "term" is missing?--Sun mowse.pngEn attendant Godot"Such is life." 09:39, 18 March 2009 (EDT)
Oh dear! Here's an older mention of the good Samaritane
"O Lord I am the woonded man, and thou art the good Samaritane: powre oile into my wounds, and bind them up."
From 'A handfull of hole-some (though homelie) hearbs' printed 1584[10], 27 years before the KJV was published.
The man is a complete and utter dick. Auld Nick 10:43, 18 March 2009 (EDT)
Okay, the version for Andy.
A good, right thinking American conservative was visiting Washington, DC to attend CPAC. The conservative did not have his gun with him, since he followed the city's unjust gun laws. He was set upon by robbers and left for dead.
An NRA member drove by in a Lincoln Navigator and noticed his plight, but thought, "well, if he had been carrying a gun, he would have been able to defend himself. He deserves his fate." He sped away to the NRA headquarters off I-66 to have dinner at the restaurant there.
Then, a pro-life activist walked by, but she said to herself, "he's an adult and can take care of himself. I have to go save defense little babies." She picked up her protest sign and headed to that day's protest at Planned Parenthood.
But, a gay liberal drove by in his Prius, and saw the conservative, and took pity on him. He folded down the back seat, to allow plenty of room for the wounder conservative to lie down. He then drove him to the hospital, where he was admitted to the emergency room.
The admissions nurse told the liberal that the conservative didn't have health insurance. The liberal pulled out his Greenpeace logo MasterCard and said "let him stay till he's fully recovered; don't kick him out as soon as you legally can." He then called some of his other liberal friends, and they held a bake sale at the organically grown locally raised food co-op to to raise money to pay conservative's bills.
When the conservative left the hospital, he learned the man who saved him was gay, so he went to get an AIDS test because he though all gays carried AIDS and it was spread by casual contact. He then started calling all of his favorite talk radio shows, blaming liberal social values for his mugging. MDB 11:02, 18 March 2009 (EDT)
Your post is perfect in its parody. Congratulations. Z3rotalk 11:24, 18 March 2009 (EDT)
Indeed. Wait, what parody? I could have sworn this was quoted from the Conservative Parables page. Brain hurts. Too much Schlafly. Etc 13:42, 18 March 2009 (EDT)
Huh? The liberal was the good guy -- I figure its the mirror image of a conservative parable. MDB 14:49, 18 March 2009 (EDT)

Other Terms[edit]

A propos Conservative Terms: how, by Andy's very own logic, can there have been such a thing in the 17th and 18th century, considering that he also claims in the very same "essay" that "conservative" as a term (and therefore, by his reasoning, as a concept) originated as late as 1831? Were those Terms somehow officially conservatized after conservativism was invented, err, discovered? --Just passing by 11:34, 18 March 2009 (EDT)

Another word listed in his "this was not available" list is "personhood". course WikiPedia (horrors of liberalism that it is) states Person and personhood were used in concepts in the early Christian theological tradition, during the first centuries A.D. by the Church Fathers. --Sun mowse.pngEn attendant Godot"Such is life." 11:39, 18 March 2009 (EDT)
I think Andy would be fine with believing that conservatism was an eternally true political ideology placed in the universe by God himself to be discovered by those with the correct way of thinking. It reminds me of an old SNL skit from back in the '80's when Reagan nominated Douglas Ginsburg in the wake of Bork's epic downfall. Ginsburg's nomination got skuttled because it came out that he had regularly used pot, and possibly even with some of his law students. That led to the skit, in which a really high Ginsburg described to similarly really high students how originalism was the one true judicial philosophy because Madison hadn't written the Constitution, but had really just discovered it as a holy object (which really, I think, gets to the essential insanity of originalism because the philosophy is really set up as though that were the case). Kaalis 12:47, 18 March 2009 (EDT)
A quick question, as I don't have a dictionary handy... In this sections of rancid excrement Andy and a few parodist mention conservative terms that dictionaries refuse to recognize due to their liberal mindset... But I can't remember, do dictionaries have multiple words terms like that? I mean, one of their example is illegal alien. A dictionary would have a definition for illegal, and for alien, but would any dictionary have an entry for a term like that? SirChuckBI have very poor judgement 15:23, 18 March 2009 (EDT)
As I read it, he is complaining that "the dictionaries" haven't yet made up words (helpfully suggested by him in the central column) for his made-up conservative concepts (left column). That's not exactly how dictionaries work though. --Just passing by 15:39, 18 March 2009 (EDT)
Chuck, 1) it depends on the dictionary. OED, in its 27 volums, is clearly more likely to include those phrases, but generally a phrase is only included if the words as a whole mean something other than what they mean individually, or if for some reason they are so used that the average reader needs to know them. "Illegal Alien" is not a compound word. it is 2 words that mean dude who is in a country illegally. "home maker" however means "dudette who cleans", not one who builds homes. (I think homemaker is really one word, but that would be the difference if it were two words). --Sun mowse.pngEn attendant Godot"Such is life." 17:06, 18 March 2009 (EDT)