Norway is a country in Scandinavia which borders Sweden, Finland and Russia. They are good at fishing, handball, cross-country skiing/biathlon, social democracy and having a massive oil reserve without becoming a failed state like Nigeria, Venezuela, or Saudi Arabia.
For much of its history (after The Black Death) Norway was subject to either the Danish or the Swedish king and many of the many wars between those two countries were ultimately about who gets Norway.
After World War II, Norway became a social democracy, meaning that the people have universal health care and complain because they have to pay taxes. Norway's democratic traditions go back to 1884 and it has only since been under authoritarian rule once, from 1940 to 1945, when it was occupied by Nazi Germany under puppet leader Vidkun Quisling, whose name is now another synonym for turncoat. Norway has been a member of NATO since its founding in 1949.
Norway's government negotiated to join what is now the European Union, but a 1972 referendum rejected membership (53.5% to 46.5%). Norway made a second attempt to join the EU, but this was again rejected in a 1994 referendum (52.2% to 47.8%); on both occasions, rural voters skewed more strongly against and voters in the capital city, Oslo, skewed more in favor (this is something it probably has in common with England). Norway is, however, a member of the European Economic Area, making it among other things (customs union, Europol, Frontex,...) part of the Schengen Area, giving it passport-free travel to most of the EU (except for, of course, the United Kingdom and Republic of Ireland). This in turn means that many of the laws enacted by the EU apply to them as well. Norway thus suffers from self-inflicted legislation without representation, something which will also apply to the UK following Brexit. So why does Norway not simply join the EU and be done with it? Well, you see, one of the first things the EU took a lot of interest (and power) in was farming and fishing. Given Norway's traditional reliance on fisheries, there is a point to not being part of the EU. A similar thing can be said of Iceland, of course.
Political parties of Norway
The leading political parties of Norway are:
- Arbeiderpartiet (Ap): The Labour Party, the social democrats, which has dominated Norwegian politics since 1935. After the 2019 Norwegian local elections, it lost the most votes ever seen in a Norwegian local election (after WW2) due to unclear incentives and a lack of traditional labour policies.
- Fremskrittspartiet (Frp): The "Progress" Party, the right-wing populists, who think Norway would be better off with fewer taxes and immigrants. Some argue the name is misleading.
- Høyre (H): The Conservative Party, the liberal-conservative party. Likes to pull the brakes. Currently in power.
- Sosialistisk Venstreparti (SV): The Socialist Left Party, a socialist party. The party was founded on dissatisfaction of the labour party's foreign policy, especially its NATO friendliness and the labour party's opening of allowing nuclear weapon on Norwegian soil. It entered its first government in 2005 with the redgreen governmet (a government of Socialist Left, Labour and Centre party) which lasted until 2013. The popularity of SV shrank to a reach a level close to the threshhold of 4% in the 2013 election, however it regained more popularity in the 2017 election.
- Senterpartiet (Sp): The Centre Party, a centrist agrarian party with strong isolationist and traditionalist inclinations. Formerly called Bondepartiet ("Farmer's Party"). Strongly opposes membership in the European Union. After the 2019 Norwegian local elections, it won a record number of votes partially because it was seen as a more dependable opposition party against the current government, whilst the traditional centre-left party - The Labour Party - suffered terribly due to reasons stated above.
- Kristelig Folkeparti (KrF): The Christian Democratic Party, the morally conservative party, which wants to curb abortion, alcohol consumption, homosexuality and other un-Godly things. Currently in power.
- Venstre (V): The Liberal Party, a social liberal party which used to be the biggest party of the left (until the interwar years), but now is more of a centre-right shadow of its former self, notable as one of two parties opposing increased surveillance and supporting people's right to download music without being sued. Currently in power.
- Miljøpartiet de Grønne (MdG): The green party, the main environmentalist party in Norway. The Green Party started its growth in 2012 and all the way to 2015 afterwards its popularity declined and later stabilized. Notable as the only party which declares no affiliation to the historic right/left-wing blocs of politics. However due to the prominence of Frp in the right wing bloc, the green party has found itself mostly working with the left.
- Rødt (R): The Red Party, also a socialist party like SV, but more red and revolutionary as it's the only leading party that believes it's urgent to get rid of capitalism. It was founded as a merger of Arbeidernes Kommunistparti(marxist-leninistene) and Rød Valgallianse in 2007. Notable as one of two parties opposing increased surveillance and supporting people's right to download music without being sued. Prior to the 2017 election, the red party had no representation in the parliament, however after the local elections of 2015, the red party saw a growth in both membership and popularity which has continued until this day.
In addition, there are several minor parties, including:
- Folkeaksjonen nei til mer bompenger (FNB): The People's Party No To More Tolls, a party that really doesn't like toll roads (duh!). Most prominent in the country's biggest cities.
- Pensjonistpartiet (PP): Pensioners party, a party which focuses on pensioners interests.
- Helsepartiet (HP): The health party, a party that focuses mostly on healthcare.
- De Kristne (DK): The Christians. A non-parliamentary party for Christian fundamentalists. A relatively new party, started as a reaction to KrF getting too moderate.
- Kystpartiet (K): The Coastal Party, a non-parliamentary party which apparently cares a lot about coasts.[note 1] Center-right, conservative, isolationist, emphasizes fishing and coastal issues and opposes membership in the European Union.
- Selvstendighetspartiet (ShP): The Independence Party, a tiny non-parliamentary party who think the FrP does not have enough Islamophobia.
- Alliansen: The Alliance, another fringe xenophobic party, this one led by alt-right crank Hans Jørgen Lysglimt Johansen.
Miscellaneous Norwegian trivia
In recent decades, oil has made the Norwegians very wealthy. The Norwegian government has used their fabulous oil wealth to fund extensive social programs in healthcare, education, childcare, and welfare. Norway has claimed the #1 spot on the Human Development Index for over a decade now.
Norway has legalised gender-neutral marriage, effective starting in 2009.
Though Norway has two competing standards for writing its national language, Norwegian, there is no "official" standard for spoken Norwegian. Regional dialects, unlike in many other countries, are actually celebrated rather than despised, so that it is considered socially acceptable to use them in public contexts such as television or in Parliament. Indeed, Norway's Education Act even states that "the teacher 'should pay due attention to the vernacular used by pupils, and that he or she should not attempt to make them abandon their home dialect.'"
Norway is often criticized for hunting whales and seals and for the perceived hypocrisy of allowing the harpooning and shooting of marine mammals while banning Schechita and Dhabihah on the grounds that both are cruel to animals.
Norway is also the home to one of the most extreme forms of music there is, Norwegian Black Metal. Its musicians and fans burned churches and killed each other in the name of being the most evil. An example of a nutjob Norwegian Black Metal musician is Varg Vikernes.
Notable Norwegian cranks
- Anders Behring Breivik
- Hege Storhaug
- Max Hermansen
- Nina Hjerpset-Østlie
- Hans Jørgen Lysglimt Johansen
- Hans Rustad
- Christian Tybring-Gjedde
Men's rights movement
- "I hope they speak Norwegian in HELL!" (They do.)
- Norwegian life
- In Norway, Prime Ministers (and NATO Secretaries General) drive taxis.
- Vote Norwegian!
- On second thought, let's not go to Norway. 'Tis a silly place.
- A documentary about the Norwegian blue parrot. Although it's possible that the documentarians have some of their facts wrong. (The bird does have lovely plumage, though.)