RationalWiki's 2019 Fundraiser

There is no RationalWiki without you. We are a small non-profit with no staff – we are hundreds of volunteers who document pseudoscience and crankery around the world every day. We will never allow ads because we must remain independent. We cannot rely on big donors with corresponding big agendas. We are not the largest website around, but we believe we play an important role in defending truth and objectivity.

If everyone who saw this today donated $5, we would meet our goal for 2019.

Fighting pseudoscience isn't free.
We are 100% user-supported! Help and donate $5, $20 or whatever you can today with PayPal Logo.png!

Donations so far: $6000Goal: $6000
Information icon.svg The 2018 moderator election has started! We are electing 6 moderators and 2 alternatives to serve in 2019. Nominate users here and read their campaign slogans here!

Fun:Squirrel diet

From RationalWiki
Jump to: navigation, search

Squirrel diets are the only real working diets out there. Because all natural.

Diet Examples[edit]

Country squirrels[edit]

Nuts, seeds, mushrooms, pine cones, nuts, leaves, nuts, bark, lichens, nuts, and the occasional bird egg.

City squirrels[edit]

A city squirrel practicing freeganism

Freeganism is teh rule here. Scraps and handouts from teh city park and outdoor restaurant tables, supplemented with bird seed from your bird feeder and teh occasional dumpster dive.

Lose weight fast![1][edit]

Our sources say rapid weight loss and incredible health can be obtained by following the Squirrel Diet. Better than Atkins! More powerful than a can of spinach! Rawer than raw foodism! More primal than teh caveman diet! More macro and biotic than macrobiotics!

Controversy[edit]

Some people are nuts, they don't like this diet.
There are also reports of falling off trees and electrocution[2].

Enjoy these as an addition to a healthy diet![edit]

Footnotes[edit]

  1. hyperspeed voice over:results vary, participants required to leap from tree to tree, climb telephone poles and be chased by both cats and dogs to obtain results/voiceover
  2. They lived